Louis Fowler’s Pandemic Journal: God Complex

During Monday’s Coronavirus briefing with the press, Trump turned the microphone over to MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell—the dude that makes the mostly-comfortable foam-based head-rester—who, after giving self-aggrandizing news regarding their mask-making capabilities, proceeded to, “off the cuff”, tell the American public to read their Bibles.

The Christian one.

To be fair, Lindell actually said that on Nov. 8, 2016, God gave America—a nation that has turned their back to Him, mind you—a second chance at glory with the election of the Godhead Trump and that, perhaps, this will get prayer back in schools, if schools even exist anymore. And then to read their Bibles.

Still the Christian one.

You know, in many forms of post-apocalyptic media, there’s always a self-righteous sect of spiritual sycophants eager to bring forth a terrible Armageddon, believing their defeat over Lucifer and his demonic dum-dums will usher in a return to a 1950s-era (read: Caucasian) of American values they seem to constantly masturbate over.

https://youtu.be/tVzP5TuZOIw

So, really, when you think about it, we’re right on speculative time for all this…thank God I still have a stack of Petra records and a few Jack Chick tracts lying around. They get read!

Before you start taking your wholly holy anger out on me—I can see it ramping up—I will admit, I’m a tenuous believer, possibly the only one around here. Sure, I left my area church of five years sometime back after finding out they were a dangerous—to me, at least—fundamentalist cult, but I’ve never ever lost my faith in God, even if I really should have by now.

Praying is a beautiful thing, one that can help give us strength through times of strife, static or, you know, global pandemics. But it seems that Trump and his devilish disciples are—especially down here in Oklahoma, where Governor Stitt recently held a government-sponsored televised worship service—using people’s untested faith to push a morally dangerous and typically unbiblical agenda that will hurt those they consider to be the unchosen.

But, I guess to get to the End Times, what are a few million dead immigrants or gays or atheists or…

How about, instead of believing that God is some bearded wizard in the sky that grants you (or doesn’t, if you’re bad) wishes—as many Christians do these days—having faith in a God, whatever that may be, who judiciously blesses different people with a keen aptitude for science and that talent will develop a cure for Covid-19?

Sure, they may be an immigrant or gay or atheist, but, to paraphrase the modern Christ-like figure of Bono, God moves in mysterious ways. He’s God—he doesn’t have to answer to you or me or, especially, Trump.

But, more than likely, as the Four Horsemen gallop across the Earth, I’ll just be labeled another false prophet, a damnable heretic and a charlatan apostle that, really, should be burned alive by the brain-boiling fever of this fucking flu. So it is written and so it shall be done.

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Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler and Instagram at @louisfowler78.

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13 Responses


  1. Pillow talk is usually reserved for the…mmmm..bedroom.


  2. How do you milk sheep? You pass the plate once a week.


  3. Great work, Louis. I too am a believer and nothing will change that, even seeing many of my believer friends buy into the venom that their new false god of fake news spouts daily with a little help from his friends. I cringed when I saw pillowman called up because I knew what was coming. More praise for the orange one while suggesting that everyone read the Bible, as if Trump is mentioned right there in the Garden of Gesthemane.

    Just like I want to scream to all the gun-toting, flag hugging “Trump is our only hope” people, I want to scream to your readers: “TRUMP IS NOT GOD AND GOD AIN’T ANYTHING LIKE TRUMP!”

    Oh yeah, and the pillow guy is an idiot.


    1. Amen


  4. The “My Pillow” guy was exactly who our nation needed to hear from in these days of crisis. He delivered a timely message about reading our bibles and returning our nation’s attention to God, on whom we have collectively turned our backs. (Mike Lindell is a scammer in multiple disciplines! Pillows, and now religion and politics. Impressive!)

    My guess is that our collective turning of our backs on God (the Christian version thereof) is the reason that the evil virus seems to be hitting America harder than any other place on earth. It surely has nothing to do with our being told early on by our leaders not to worry about the virus, that it was a Chinese hoax that would disappear by the weekend. Or that it was cool to take your kids to crowded restaurants, and not to worry about getting sick.

    If Kenneth Copeland’s bossing the Devil around has had any effect so far, I haven’t noticed it in news reports. Nor has a vaccine fallen from Heaven. (But I don’t watch Fox, so maybe…)

    Preacher Copeland also commanded recently that everyone continue tithing during this crisis. But how much do you tithe if you have lost your income? Because 10% of zero is…. (Do the math!)

    Louis, it sounds like your beliefs aren’t so different from my own. I escaped from another dangerous cult decades ago, and somehow managed never to be sexually molested while growing up there. Guess I wasn’t so easily manipulated as some other boys. Or maybe not pretty enough.


  5. The “My Pillow” guy was exactly who our nation needed to hear from in these days of crisis. He delivered a timely message about reading our bibles and returning our nation’s attention to the Christian God, on whom we have collectively turned our backs. (Mike Lindell is a scammer in multiple disciplines! Pillows, and now religion and politics. Impressive!)

    My guess is that our collective turning of our backs on God (the Christian version thereof) is the reason that the evil virus seems to be hitting America harder than any other heathen place on earth. It surely has nothing to do with our being told early on by our leaders not to worry about the virus, that it was a Chinese hoax that would disappear by the weekend. Or that it was cool to take your kids to crowded restaurants, and not to worry about getting sick.

    If Kenneth Copeland’s bossing the Devil around has had any effect so far, I haven’t noticed it in news reports. Nor has a vaccine fallen from Heaven. (But I don’t watch Fox, so maybe…)

    Preacher Copeland also commanded recently that everyone continue tithing during this crisis. But how much do you tithe if you have lost your income? Because 10% of zero is…. (Do the math!)

    Louis, it sounds like your beliefs aren’t so different from my own. I escaped from a different dangerous cult decades ago, and somehow managed never to be sexually molested while growing up there. Guess I wasn’t so easily manipulated as some other boys. Or maybe not pretty enough.


    1. Sorry for the double post. The site has been acting a bit weird recently.


  6. I’ll stick to science, thank you.


  7. I’m all for these Holy Rollers having their services and Liberty University resuming classes. Knock yourselves out – just stay the fuck away from me!


    1. HalleFuckinglujah and AMEN!


  8. Well said Louis…well said indeed!


  9. Given a choice of getting morality lessons from a pillow salesman and a preacher, I think I might be better off listening to the pillow guy.


  10. I always wonder who would win the Universe Boxing Championship: God or Satan?

    God has the reach advantage and is real good at predicting the opponents’ moves, but Satan has some tricky moves that might confuse God and can also flick his long tail around and sting God, scorpion-style.

    I dunno. Maybe it’d be a draw.

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