John Daly begs Daddy Trump to pardon Joe Exotic

As the fabric of our reality shreds by the day, life has been getting weirder and weirder. Oklahoma is notoriously famous only for bad reasons, and Joe Exotic’s story going worldwide has put another cringey pin in our state this year.

Yesterday, John Daly, who is arguably the greatest wildman in the history of professional golf, sent out a message about Joe Exotic:

I have to take a breath first to break this down.

The phrase ‘Daddy Trump’ just makes my entire body shrivel. Being a grown adult and calling anyone ‘daddy’ is super weird unless you’re doing it for a kink thing, which I will not shame.

Second, he says he had the best mullet in the 90s, and anyone from Oklahoma knows that is simply not true. We have documented several local mullets that put Daly’s to shame. The Boz would like a word with you, sir.

If the best ‘Grip It and Rip It’ Daly can do to drum up interest in pardoning Joe is whiffing a Coor’s Light can and saying ‘daddy,’ that’s not a great call to action. But my real suspicion here is that somebody on the Joe Exotic social media team paid John Daly for this video. I dunno if they still have the money leftover to fork over, but for the price of $750 you can pay Long John to say anything for a custom Cameo video.

Who knows, though. Daly is a weirdass party animal that would fit right in hanging around with Joe. It’s not hard to imagine them putting around on a golf cart with a snow tiger in the back. And in 2020, guys with mullets gotta stick together. Whether Joe gets his pardon or not is yet to be seen, but we’ll keep you advised.