Peacocks Terrorize Newcastle Neighborhood

Over my long, lonely quarantine months, I’ve spent a lot of time birdwatching. There’s a bunch of trees surrounding my apartment balcony, and they attract all sorts of critters. It’s peaceful to sit outside with my cat and watch the assorted woodpeckers and cardinals and other ones that I don’t know the name of because I’m dumb.

But thank god I don’t have peacocks roaming my streets. They’re beautiful but have the most hellacious screams. Unfortunately, some Newcastle residents are having to do with that. From KFOR:

NEWCASTLE, Okla. (KFOR) – Neighbors, fed up with a growing pride of peacocks across the street, called In Your Corner hoping to apply pressure for change.

Barbara Kalkbrenner and Adonna Hudson have lived out on South Rockwell for around 45 years combined.

But around a decade-and-a-half back, their quiet cul-de-sac welcomed some new neighbors.

“Nobody wants to do anything to help,” noted Barbara.

They say they’re helpless against a pride of peacocks, reportedly 300 deep across the street.

The birds are owned by a man named Randall Schmidt.

“It started out small, and in the last year, I’d say, it’s just exploded,” said Adonna. “During the daytime, during the nighttime. It’s all you hear, sounds like cats crying.”

“When it rains, it smells horrible,” added Barbara.

Seriously, have you ever heard one of these motherfuckers scream? Back in my mallratting days, I’d ride to Crossroads Mall with my friend Ryan in his beat-up Ford sedan. We usually took the service road, and there was a house by the fire station where someone had a peacock in their yard. We yelled at it one time as a joke and it just SHRILLED at us so loud. It became a running joke to make the peacock yell at us every week.

I digress. This is an ‘In Your Corner’ story, so of course KFOR had to confront the peacock farmers.

We approached Mr. Schmidt outside his home, to get his side.

He was quick to point out a large number of chickens/roosters at his neighbors house, indicative again of the lack of ordinances.

But before we could press him further, he closed his garage door in our face.

This was a calm response given Schmidt’s history. This year alone he’s been arrested for allegedly trying to run over his neighbor in his own yard, and for brandishing a gun around a group of kids.

“He pulled a gun on my grandkids,” said Barbara. “Told them they would be dead.”

Well, THAT took a turn. I honestly thought the only people that would want to own peacocks would be hippies like Wayne Coyne, or shut-in Grey Gardens cat ladies. Apparently, some of them are violent gun-toting people who threaten to murder children.

I’ve got no problem with people in city limits having a couple of chickens, even though they can get loud. But 300 weird shrill exotic birds in your backyard is a bit much.

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12 Responses


  1. Oh. You’re just talking about the birds….However…..

    Here’s the next (in)famous Oklahoma documentary for Netflix – The Peacock King. Newcastle will finally be put on the map.


    1. Yes, the ingredients are all there.

      Competing foul fowl raisers.

      Assault.

      Guns.

      Sex. Apparently the cocks among the peacocks are getting it on.

      Gay and brightly colored costumes; with flair!

      A secret lair (okay, a garage, might have to step that up a bit).

      Hysterical screaming (substituting for presidential/gubernatorial campaigning).

      Where are Barbara and Adonna’s husbands? Just asking questions?


  2. Well, I never thought about it much till now, but you might want to ask Mr. Schmidt; If a fully de-feathered and de-headed peacock would be about the same body-size as a turkey?

    That brings up a few more questions; Would a dressed-out peacock fit into a turkey roasting pan?

    Does a baked peacock taste the same as a turkey?

    What temperature do you bake a peacock at?

    How long do you bake a peacock?

    Do you feed cracked corn to peacock a week or two before they’re slaughtered to fatten them up as you do with cattle?

    Do you just burn up the feathers or is there a market for the feathers in places like Nepal or Bangladesh?

    Is it true that Coyotes and Mountain Lions will come from as far as 30 miles away for a peacock meal?

    Is there any truth to the rumor that if one peacock will dring poisoned water, they all will drink the poisoned water?

    Is there any truth that eagles and turkey vultures take peacocks and without leaving a trace?

    Is it true that eagles and turkey vultures will come in groups up to 25 at a time and take peacocks on a daily basis until they are all gone?


  3. Google Maps shows South Rockwell to be a rural area a good distance from the “town” of Newcastle. I would be surprised if this area is within the Newcastle city limits.

    Therefore it’s probably legal to raise any sort of livestock at all out there. Freedom to Farm, and all that.

    Maybe it would be worse to live across the fence from a commercial chicken operation, like some folks in eastern Oklahoma have to put up with. Or maybe a big, smelly hog-raising facility nearby, as they have in parts of western Oklahoma.

    Or maybe not. I have heard a small number of peacocks screaming. It’s not pleasant. I can’t even imagine 300.

    WHY is the cantankerous Old Man Schmidt raising so many peacocks? They would make horrible pets. Are they worth money somehow?


    1. It’s 2 miles from the actual town, but well within city limits. It is rural, but so is much the whole town, that is until we more developers out here than we already have.


  4. Why are you guys harassing Mr. Schmidt who’s just enjoying his freedoms and liberties as enshrined in the Constitution? Plus does his 2nd Amendment rights scare them little libtards? Thank God for towns like Newcastle that refuse to impose those freedom sucking city ordnances. I’ve been wanting to raise a herd of elephants in my backyard but the liberty hating city council of Moore won’t let me. I think I’ll start looking at a new house in Newcastle.


  5. That right folks, it ain’t safe out here for you. Stay in your limits city slicker 😜


  6. The neighbors probably live out to the country in order to have space for their animals and to not be bothered by restrictive city codes and Homeowners Associations. Be careful what you wish for.


  7. Raising peacocks is yet another get rich quick thing that is going to put Oklahoma on yet another dubious “Top Ten List” probably with the support of Governor Kevin (Jethro) Stitt.

    It’s actually called “Peafoul Farming” you will find many support groups for wanna be Urban Rangers on Facebook. Plus as Lucas pointed out, great alarm animals for those who might also be in a trade that requires extra security that is common in rural Oklahoma.

    Meat, eggs, plus pretty feathers all to sell plus a flock of security birds, sounds like a recipe for success for the jobs, or actually self employment in rural Oklahoma.


    1. Peafowl


    2. I guess the peafowl farmers are filling the emu ranchers’ niche as society’s most gullible denizens . I can remember the TV ads from the fifties encouraging folks to get rich quick raising chinchillas.


  8. My son lives in L.A. and he had a neighbor who had a peahen. It was noisy and nasty. Can’t imagine what a gang of them would sound and smell like.

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