Nude man in search of Fire Sauce arrested in OKC Taco Bell drive-thru

Here’s a little word of caution to all OKC metro residents – the next time you make a run for the border to grab 4th meal, make sure to put on some clothes before you head out the door.

A 61-year-old OKC man named Christopher Sale learned that the hard way on Saturday night when he cruised through the Taco Bell drive-thru on S. Meridian not once, but twice, while totally nude. Police were called and, well, The Smoking Gun has more details:

An Oklahoma man arrested Saturday night for going through a Taco Bell drive-thru naked told police that all his clothes were in the wash and that he was unaware such nude motoring was illegal, records show.

According to investigators, Christopher Sale, 61, “placed an order through the drive thru lane speaker” at a Taco Bell (seen above) about two miles from his Oklahoma City residence.

When Sale subsequently pulled his 2021 Ford Ranger to the drive-thru window to pay for his order, a 41-year-old female employee “looked into his vehicle and immediately noticed that he was completely naked,” according to a police report.

Despite Sale’s nudity, the Taco Bell worker accepted payment from him and gave him his food. However, the employee told police that she believed Sale then sought to extend the encounter by asking her to add a taco to his already completed order.

After receiving the extra taco, Sale “still did not leave and asked her for additional sauces,” which she provided. Sale then asked the Taco Bell worker for more napkins. He then pulled away in his pickup truck.

When I first saw this story, I thought it would be a good idea to hit up OKCPD for the mugshot and bodycam footage. But then I figured some things are better left to the imagination, and this story – kind of like Taco Bell’s secret ingredients – fits that bill.

That being said, you do have to give it up to Taco Bell employees here. Sure, they may not be the brightest folks, but just like a grizzled soldier, emergency room physician or State Fair janitor, they see more carnage in one weekend than most civilians do in their entire life. Whether your naked or clothed, high or drunk, or tweaking or twerking, they’re not going to judge you. They’ll provide the Mexican slop you crave at an affordable price and let you be on your way… just as long as don’t come back and try to take advantage of their kindness:

Sale immediately returned to the order speaker and “asked for even more sauces.” Both of the female victims said they believed Sale “wanted to continue the exposer incident.” A cop concurred, writing that, “Sale came to this restaurant naked with the intent of allowing himself to be seen naked especially his genital area.”

A patrolman responding to a 911 call about a naked Taco Bell customer found Sale in the drive-thru lane. He was still completely nude. A white bath towel, a cop noted, was on the vehicle’s passenger side floorboard.

But Sale immediately returned to the order speaker and “asked for even more sauces.” Both of the female victims said they believed Sale “wanted to continue the exposer incident.”

Yeah, this guy’s a nut. No offense to the Chalupa fans out there, but why would you go to Taco Bell when there’s a Taco Bueno just down the street? Sure, they also can be a bit stingy with their salsa, but it’s way better than whatever substance Taco Bell puts in those packets, and totally worth going to jail for.

Anyway, let’s wrap this up like a 7-layer burrito:

A patrolman responding to a 911 call about a naked Taco Bell customer found Sale in the drive-thru lane. He was still completely nude. A white bath towel, a cop noted, was on the vehicle’s passenger side floorboard.

While being detained around 9 PM, Sale reportedly claimed that, “I didn’t know it was against the law to drive naked.” He told a patrolman that “his clothes were all in the washer and he got hungry.”

While en route to jail, Sale “talked almost non-stop…about how unfair the situation was,” claiming that his genital area was “covered with a green towel the entire time.”

Charged with felony indecent exposure, Sale was booked into the Oklahoma County jail. He was released yesterday from custody after posting $2000 bond.

In all honesty, I had no clue that driving around naked was against the law either. How dare our government mandate we wear clothing! Let’s grab our guns and protest this oppression at the state capitol immediately. I’ll bring the sauce.