Most of us have been holed up for months now. It’s kinda like being in jail, but the snacks are better at least. We’ve reached the end of the tv series that we’ve been binge-watching, running out of movies to watch, bored out of our brains and desperate for social contact.
But guess what – OKLAHOMA IS OPEN FOR BUSINESS! That means bars and restaurants are back in full swing. Sure, it’s generally in a limited capacity, but despite the state hitting a record high of COVID cases and being one of the biggest hotspots in the nation, brunch is back baaaaaby!
Now that it is more unsafe than ever to be around crowds, I thought it would be helpful to give you some hot tips on how to go out…
Scout the Joint Out First
Every hip bar, restaurant, or brewery has multiple social media accounts. Every day they will post a photo saying, “Come out today, we have a socially distanced patio and are taking all safety precautions!” The photo will be a bunch of tables crammed together, and they’ve somehow trained a bunch of 20 year-olds how to clean meticulously.
Wear Your Mask Around Your Nose
Masks are very important to keep everyone safe. But they’re so hard to breath out of! The staff of your establishment has to wear them for 8 hours, but you can’t for a few minutes and have a clear understanding of how the mask works, so you do you.
Post a Mask Selfie
The power of social media is that nothing you’ve ever done in your life has ever happened unless you’ve posted it online. Make sure to performatively put your mask on when your food or beverage has arrived so everyone can applaud you for being safe but also be baffled about how you’re going to eat that omelet while wearing a mask.
Invite Your Superspreader Friends
If you’re going to go out for a good time while someone wearing a plastic faceshield and latex gloves is risking their own health to serve you, make it a party. Go through your Instagram feed, find the people who have been constantly hanging out with large groups, and invite them. The more the merrier, reserve a 12-top table.
Times are tough right now and a lot of us are underemployed or unemployed. We’ve all gotta tighten the belt and save money. Your server or bartender will absolutely understand if you can only leave 5% on the check, they’ve got a job at least, right?
In all seriousness, make sure during this time to support your favorite local businesses in a responsible way. Wear your mask, wash your hands, don’t be an idiot.