5 predictions for Jim Inhofe’s “final” term in office

Even though we’re almost to the 72nd consecutive hour of Election Day, not all of Tuesday’s races have us hanging by an anxious thread. In fact, TLO called the US Senate race for Jim Inhofe mere minutes after the polls closed Tuesday. Since then, we’ve decided to make some more calls about our senator’s upcoming stint. In fact, here are 5 things we can expect from Jim Inhofe’s “final” term in office!

His 92nd Birthday

I know this is a given, but I just want to remind you all of this because misery loves company.

His great-grandkids teach him how to use a cellphone

Earlier this year, Jim Inhofe was recorded in a restaurant talking to the president on speaker phone. We can’t really blame Inhofe for this one, because even though the speaker was loud enough for people across the restaurant to tune into the private conversation, Inhofe could probably barely hear it himself. So hopefully this term his great-grandkids will teach him how to turn up the volume on his cellphone without putting the conversation on speaker. Thankfully, the Jitterbug’s volume buttons are large and easy to see.

Jim Inhofe is still an Idiot: Volumes 58,214 through 842,069

Much like piloting a single engine aircraft, when it comes to how many more gaffes and overall embarrassment Jim Inhofe can create over the next 6 years the sky is the limit.

More Stunts

Jim Inhofe once said that he would retire from politics when he could no longer fly a plane upside down. It doesn’t matter that he landed a plane on a closed runway in 2010 and glided off the runway in 2016, because nothing says “sanity” and “competence” like an 85-year-old man doing air stunts. Being that he sponsored legislation that would ease medical and health requirements needed to maintain a pilot’s license, I don’t think we can expect him to outsource his campaign video stunts anytime soon.

Another Campaign

Jim Inhofe claims that this will be his final term in office. Much like an 80-something-year-old man faced with scientific research, I don’t believe it.

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23 Responses

  1. Just like the FAT ORANGE TRAITOR, inhofe is a poster boy for the saying “Only the GOOD die young!!

    Evil leaves a stain, and it will take decades if not generations to wash out the skidmarks those 2 have left on this once great country!!

  2. He finds another Republican presidential candidate to publicly fellate in front of God and everyone’s kids, again.

  3. It took TLO until minutes AFTER the polls closed to declare Inhofe the winner of his election? That had been clear at least since pre-pandemic days. You were about ten months late.

    I don’t believe that this will be Inhofe’s final term either, unless God calls him home before 2027. There is precedent in Oklahoma for politicians breaking their promise to leave office. For example…

    Markwayne Mullin promised to quit Congress after three terms. He was just elected to his fifth term. He said that with six years of experience he could “make a difference.” But then came the Dems’ 2018 “wave.” He’s probably not making much of a difference now as an insignificant member of the minority party, but unlimited access to that Congressional gym is sweet. I expect Mullin to run for Senate if Inhofe ever retires or dies.

    1. He is going to step aside for medical reasons at the end of year 4 prior to next campaign so Guvner Stitt, in his second term, can appoint Todd “Profit Before People” Lamb as a replacement.

  4. Jim Inhofe is a career politician serving in the best interest of his voters and support there in Oklahoma…who are in many way, just like him, believe in the same things, etc.. Thats why I can’t take a residence anywhere east of the Rocky Mountains. I believe everybody has a right to a home and peace, but for me I’ll find neither there as long as career conservatives hold sway over all of Oklahoma….I gotta stay out of if it.

    1. “Best interests” and “what they want” aren’t always the same thing.

      “No healthcare,” for example.

    2. Gotta actually live somewhere to vote there and fix it.

  5. American politics: perhaps the one milieu on planet Earth where age discrimination doesn’t exist.

    All kinds of OTHER discrimination? Yes. Age discrimination? No.

  6. He will resign during his term, Stitt will appoint a replacement until a special election can be held and that person will hold the position until he/ she is 92. That’s the plan. Ahh – U.S. Senator Scott Pruitt.

    1. I like the Stitt resigns so that Mat Pinnell becomes Governor and he appoints Stitt to the Senate seat so he can be the incumbent in the special election to replace Inhofe.

      It is just such an “Oklahoma Standard” way of doing things, and Stitt will stay in that spot longer than Inhofe.

      1. That’s exactly how Gov. Howard Edmondson became a US Senator – days before his term as Governor would expire.

        1. And J. Howard was unsenatorized the first chance the people got to vote on him. Too much to hope for another Fred Harris — or the original. He’s only 4 years older I’m Off (My Rocker).

    2. Here’s the plan:

      1) I will pose as a Republican

      2) I will provide Stitt with a sufficiently large bribe. Uh, I mean, campaign contribution.

      3) At the time of the handover o’ the cash, I will hypnotize Stitt, thusly: “Jethro…you is gettin’ all sleepy, an’ shit. When I snapifies my fingers, you will wake up and not remember nothin’, just like every day, except I will have done implantified a subconscious message: when Inhofe dies, you will appoint me as the incompetent to serve in his place! Now WAKE UP, hillbilly!” SNAP!

      4) And then when he appoints me, I will get sworn in and proclaim: “YEEEEEEEE HAW! I just turned Social Democrat, mofos! Get ready for some ultra-liberal changes!” And Stitt will have to resign in disgrace. I guess. Maybe he doesn’t know what “disgrace” even is. I dunno.

      I will serve as your senator until too drunk and/ or high to continue. Then I will serve another term.

      That is my sacred promise to you.

    3. That’s the plan. Maybe not Pruitt, but I think that’s the plan.

  7. O.J.Simpson could win the Oklahoma Senate seat if O.J. were to be on the Republican ticket. People in Oklahoma vote the political party and not the candidate.

  8. Unfortunately most of the out of touch, corrupt senators were re-elected again. How many votes will Inhofe miss this term??

    1. Doesn’t matter if he misses votes…he doesn’t care since he got re-elected. What an Oklahoma joke!

      1. Personally, I’m OK with Republicans missing votes. The Republican Party is a terrorist organization bent on destroying the United States.

  9. Just keep on flying your ugly little peckerwood airplane upside down, senator prune face.

  10. Senator snowball has a time problem.

    Melting confidence is not a question of age–but judgement on the part of the electorate.

  11. Because I’m knocking at the door of geezerdom, I was about to fire off an angry rant, pointing out the obvious ageist claptrap in this article.

    But then, I remembered Tuesday’s election results that proved that most Oklahomans are demented way before their time and that I’m an oddball who should probably be grateful that I can still tell my cellphone from the TV remote.

  12. Who, in the entirety of FUCK, voted for this batshit, senile fucking idiot?

    1. Most likely? Not many people. See that “straight ticket” option at the top of the ballot? That’s where most of his votes came from.

      We really should petition to get a measure on the ballot to remove the straight ticket option on the ballot.

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