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7 things we’d add to the OKC Cultural Box!

12:55 PM EST on December 17, 2020

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Good news, fellow last-minute holiday shoppers and uncultured swine! Seven of Oklahoma’s most beloved cultural centers, including the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum, the OKC Museum of Art, and Science Museum Okl... errr.... The Omniplex, have combined their resources to create the OKC Cultural Box. Though this holiday gift only costs $50, each box contains $200 worth of museum passes, souvenir shop mainstays, and other knick-knacks that represent the best of Oklahoma’s heritage.

Though it’s a swell idea to create a gift box that celebrates the Oklahoma way of life, I’m not sure how representative a bunch of museum tickets are of our state’s culture. So, here’s 7 things we’d put in the OKC Cultural Box!

The TL-OKC Cultural Box, if you will.

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Two Tickets to the Rattlesnake Derby

As it stands, the OKC Culture Box features tickets to museums across the metro. However, the average Oklahoman hasn’t visited the Art Museum since they had to write an English paper on Chihuly glass after their 8th grade field trip. So why not offer tickets to something a little more up our alley, like the 2021 Mangum Rattlesnake Derby?

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Cold Case Playing Cards

Playing cards are neat ways Oklahoma’s cultural centers are celebrating important aspects of our state’s heritage.  While the OKC Cultural Box includes decks of playing cards commissioned by local museums that feature Chihuly glass or influential women from Oklahoma’s history, the TLO-KC Cultural Box features a deck of the Oklahoma Department of Corrections’ limited-edition Unsolved Homicides & Missing Persons playing cards.

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A Coupon for 25% off Any Lift Kit Installation

If there’s anything Oklahomans love more than installing a lift kit on their American-made truck, it’s getting a discount on the installation of a lift kit on their American-made truck.

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A Jar of Red Dirt

As I’ve bellyached about before, whether it’s for naming a construction company, creating a genre of music, or dying shirts to sell at a Love’s truck stop, Oklahomans have an unhealthy obsession with red dirt. So, a cultural box would not be complete without including at least a pint of the soil. Put it in a mason jar and use it as a conversation piece in your rustic-chic living room. Take a spoonful orally to get your daily recommended dose of iron. The world is your oyster and this dirt is your culture, Oklahoma.

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A Commemorative Braum’s Milk Glass

When coming in from out of state, you always know you’re getting closer to Oklahoma by the concentration of Braum’s you start seeing on the side of the road. Once you start seeing one every couple of miles, you know you’re home. So, celebrate home and whatever the hell A2 milk is by including a commemorative Braum’s milk glass in every box.

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A Mold-A-Matic Retro Souvenir from the OKC Zoo

Okay, so this actually is in the OKC Culture Box. But I think we should keep it in because 1. They’re neat knick-knacks that support wildlife conservation and our local zoo, plus 2. The Mold-A-Matic machine was out-of-order last time I visited the museum and I’m still salty about it.

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Two Frontier City Passes

Instead of passes to visit the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum, include passes to a place a little more culturally accurate to the daily life of the average Oklahoman. The stereotypical western décor, fried food, and child laborers running the coasters of Frontier City are more representative of everyday Oklahoma life than oil paintings and a bronze bust of Reagan.

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Hayley has culture and so can you! Follow her on twitter @squirrellygeek and become a contributing member of TLO here.

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