7 seedy things you’ll find on the Oklahoma Dark Web

12:42 PM EDT on June 24, 2021

Bad news, ya'll!

According to KFOR, nefarious fiends from the obscure bowels of the internet have launched a ransomware attack against the City of Tulsa, stealing thousands of people's sensitive information and allegedly leaking it to the Dark Web.

For those of you who use the internet for less deviant activities like obscure local social blogging, the Dark Web is known as a seedy part of the internet where anonymous users engage in sketchy-if not illegal- activities. I'm sure the Oklahoma Dark Web has much more than Tulsan addresses and lists of parking citations. In fact, here's 7 other things you'll find on the Oklahoma Dark Web.

Bootlegged OETA Movie Club Episodes to Torrent

You gotta crack a few eggs (and probably codes) to watch “OETA Movie Club Presents-Lawrence of Arabia” without being interrupted by intermittent, desperate pleas to donate to your local PBS station.

A Bible Study Chatroom

Because talking about Jesus’ actual teachings and lessons is way too radical for polite Oklahoma society.

Counterfeit Vaccination Cards

If you want to cash in on the daily free Krispy Kreme donut offer without getting ~~the antibodies~~ Bill Gate’s mind control serum, some anonymous user on the Dark Web will hook you up with counterfeit vaccination cards.

The Sonic Signature Sauce Recipe

According to the Dark Web, it’s not vegan. Nor is it intended for human consumption.

Seedy Blogs

Ever since grandpa was taught how to open Internet Explorer, he's been getting into trouble. If he's not sending money to a Prince in some far-off land, he's clicked on an ad about the 7 vegetables that cleanse your pancreas and installed malware. He thought he's been posting on Facebook about the seed bank he's been cultivating from his backyard garden for the last 7 years. Turns out, he has quite the anonymous following on the Dark Web.