In an effort to eek every last drop out of Gundygate, some friends and I spent last evening trying the figure out who the next local celebrity to “pull a Gundy” and get national headlines for a tirade will be. Here is what we came up with. Which do you think is the most likely? Any other ideas?
Jenni Carlson
The Target: Mike Gundy
Jenni has been through a lot over the past two weeks, and has shown remarkable restraint in not losing her cool after being publicly humiliated. I fully expect to see her completely lose it in a future OSU press conference and am really hopeful that the phrase “I’M A WOMAN! I’m 32!” is used.
Bob Stoops
The Target: Sideline Reporter
I’m an OU fan, and I like Bob Stoops, but I always cringe when I see he is about to be interviewed at halftime by a sideline reporter. He clearly hates the entire exercise, and if he deems the question to be silly isn’t afraid to offer a rude response. It is only a matter of time before he goes full-Gundy on Jack Arute or Erin Andrews.
Gary England
The Target: The NCAA
Gary England is at his best during the spring, when severe weather is at it’s peak. He’s always interrupting tv shows and saying awesome things like “dustnado,” “power flashes,” and “Val Castor.” It makes even the most heterosexual guys swoon. But Gary England’s least favorite time of year is during the NCAA tournament, when he’s allowed to break into programming a lot less. I expect that very soon he will be on the phone with the NCAA, demanding that they move the tournament to September or some time when there is less severe weather to report.
Clark Matthews
The Target: Dave Hunziker
Clark himself worries he might be the next to pull a Gundy. Here are his words:
A typical Hunziker call goes something like this. “Second and ten from the Cowboy twenty. The snap. Fakes a handoff to Savage. Robinson swings a pass over to Bowman. It’s caught! He breaks a tackle!! And he’s off! Finally taken down by a host of defenders! It’ll be third and seven for the Cowboys.”
The next time he starts screaming like Dantrell Savage has broken into daylight then ends the call by saying, “gain of two” or raising his voice nine octaves to say “HE TAKES THE THREE!!!…and it’s off back iron” it just might be me pulling a Gundy.
Jim Traber
The Target: Random Caller
Actually, Traber pulls a Gundy in nearly every single one of his broadcasts. We just need someone to send a tape of his show to some national outlet so it’ll get the publicity it deserves.
Bobbi Burbridge Lane
The Target: TheLostOgle.com
After we announced that we’re pushing for adult film star Ashlynn Brooke to be named OKC’s official tourism ambassador, the first thing we did was hire a security firm here at The Lost Ogle Headquarters. Frankly, Bobbie Burbridge Lane’s lectures on the radio about pornography have us scared witless, and we’re pretty sure she’s going to show up here and try to beat the hell out of us.
Merv Johnson
The Target: Bob Barry Sr.
If you want to play a drinking game that will get you drunk extremely quickly, you just listen to the broadcast of an OU football game and take a drink every time Big Bob Barry says “Caught. Dropped.” Merv Johnson is a mild-mannered guy, but I imagine sometime soon he’s going to snap the 613th time Bob Barry confuses a complete pass with an incomplete pass.
First! That’s all I have to say.
I’m thinking the next woman to pull a Gundy will be Amy McRee, as she expresses her outrage at you naming Ashlynn Brooke as the next Tourism Ambassador. Amy will publish an even better photo of herself with the caption, “Yes, they’re real…and they’re spectacular!”
Yeah, but did you call shotgun?
I’m still looking for that ‘porn phone’ the Burbridge Foundation keeps talking about. Apparently you have to be a kid in order to know how to purchase it.
As long as we are commenting on porn stars.
I saw a headline on koco.com that local churches are going to be participating in pornography.
I haven’t been to a church in years but I’m thinking this might be a good weekend to start.
I think you guys should take after newsok and ask us the more important questions “What has Barry Switzer meant to Oklahoma?”
He means that forever more we’ll have to hear the following…… How ’bout them Cowboys?!?! ……. No wait…. That was Jimmie Johnson.
Tell me again…. Is Switzer the guy that does weather for KWTV 9?
Women of Oklahoma
Target: Al Eschbach
Stop the mysogyny!!!!!!!!
Mike Gassaway
Target: Women who ratted him out.
Lose my attorney’s license? No way!!!
Amy McRee
Target: TheLostOgle.com
Stop stalking and harassing me!!!!!
If all of us men stopped stalking and
harassing Amy McRee, what would we do
the rest of the day?
It is called ratings, not stalking!
Ashlynn Brooke looks like she could be Amy McRee’s little sister. Just sayin’.
Lance Cargill
Target: Stacey Cameron (News 9)
Since when does News 9 do journalism, let alone investigative journalism? Lance is just a kid!! he’s not 40!!
Brent Skarky from Oklatravelnet
Target: The Lost Ogle
When Brent finds out what you guys said about him, he will hammer you all. We love Brent!!
We didn’t even really say anything bad about him. I’m not even sure why he would hammer us. But we will be on the lookout.
Brent punches like a girl.
Brent floats like a butterfly.
Dude, is “hammer” really the best term to use when defending your sexuality?
Dean Blevins
Target: Bartender at Channel 9 Christmas Party when he announces last call as Dean is making his move on an intern.
Hrmm…
I am going to hope for something more entertaining and less obvious. Maybe a President Boren Gundy flip out, or maybe Jim Couch.
“Maybe a President Boren Gundy flip out”
Didn’t Boren already do that last year when he whined about the Oregon game, to the Big 12 commissioner, asking that the game not count and saying that calling it an “outrageous injustice” would be an “understatement?”
Was it a full Gundy? Or more of a Gary England?
With Boren let’s just hope it’s not a full monty.