Dear Jesus,
This is Patrick from TheLostOgle.com. I know this is kind of late, but I’d like to go ahead and thank you for having the UPS guy accidentally drop off those Harry and David Pears at my house around Christmas. They were delicious. And I think my neighbor ended up getting another order at no charge, so it was a win-win for everyone.
Anyway, I got another favor to ask. When you get a moment, can you look into making Bob Knight the head coach for the Oklahoma State men’s basketball program next season? By making this happen, you would be doing a huge favor to several thousand people across Oklahoma.
You see, here in Oklahoma City there is a sports talk station called The Sports Animal. The most annoying host on The Sports Animal is a guy named Jim Traber (you’ve probably never heard of him). Yesterday, Mr. Traber vowed to basically no longer acknowledge, address or have anything to do with Oklahoma State men’s basketball program if they fired Sean Sutton and replaced him with Coach Knight. If this were to happen, we would hope that Mr. Traber would have to either quit his job and/or eat the biggest piece of humble pie ever made, which would be an amazing thing!
So Jesus, please please please do what you can and make Coach Knight the Cowboys next head coach. The people of Oklahoma and I would really appreciate it.
Your friend,
Patrick
p.s. - Go ahead and put this request in front of that Maggie Carlo thing I emailed you a few weeks ago. It can wait.
As someone who likes it when the Cowboys basketball team wins games, I’d be all for this, as well. Shutting up Traber would just be gravy.
“Please baby Jesus make this happen!”
Wouldn’t you rather have a coach who wins games?
Hmm, shutting up Trabor, or getting a good coach.
Damn, thats a tough one
Why do you guys hate my Dad so much? Did you know he played in the big leagues?
I think i’ll have another beer.
If that would happen I just might become a donor to the program up north also, God make it happen, what a pompus old windbag Traber is.
As always,
BETNHI
Traber hates Bob Knight with the passion that only a D-listed, wanna-be jock can have. It must be galling. The three national championships, Olympic gold medal etc. Jim just can’t get why a person, while flawed, can be more popular than a broken down moron on sports radio in a backwater market place. How funny that in JT’s mind someone would care if he abandoned the OSU program. Sorry, but Sean has been a disaster. Too bad Jimbo does not hold him to the same standards that he does Coach Knight.
Let Knight take over at A&M. Turgeon goes to KU and OSU gets Bill Self. Traber stays put. We don’t want to lose him to Canadian television.
Would Jim Traber perform the Seppuku via ham samich if OSU were to hire Roger Clemens as pitching coach?
Can we at least make this happen to test my theory?
Traber is a loud-mouthed, self-centered idiot! You hear me big-man? He played in the big leagues and fought a japanese baseball palyer that he outweighed by 100lbs. He also has a son that will be the best linebacker ever to play the game, better than Butkus, Singelatary, Urlacher etc. Too bad he is only 5′9″. He is on the needle too, but Jimblow does not realize it…………..
Give me a break…Traber’s son left home from his loving father’s home haha over 4 months ago, I heard Traber took his son off the team because he visited his Mother. GO BIG JIM…are you afraid your son might be the BIGGER AND BETTER TRABER OF THE FAMILY? No wonder he has nothing to say…he has no idea what he is up to… go watch American Ideal with Jewels as that is all you got family man!!