Meet Oklahoma’s most famous straight and celibate musician…

Last week, we linked to a post at PerezHilton.com claiming that Jessie Kern, the son of homophobic State Rep Sally Kern, was gay. In an interview with the Tulsa World on Friday, Jesse decisively put those gay rumors to rest by stating he is “Straight and not gay.” To help support that statement, he also stated that he is celibate, a music teacher, and the director of the School of Metaphysics in Des Moines, Iowa.

Yep, that’s right. Sally Kern’s son is not a homosexual. He’s just your regular old celibate music teacher who happens to be fascinated with metaphysics. It wasn’t mentioned in the interview, but I would probably bet that Jesse also likes the B-52s and Mint Milanos. I say that because even though he claims to be straight, he still seems pretty ghey to me.

Anyway, unless Sally Kern resigns or some sex tape of her is released on the internet, this will hopefully be the last post regarding her, her son or her daughter-in-law. Also, we hope the “entirely factual” news mentioned above appeases Mike McCarville, who scolded us last Wednesday for posting the Perez Hilton stuff. Mike is a former KTOK radio host and a veteran right wing Oklahoma political reporter who has an easy to remember blog called wwwtmrcom.blogspot.com. He’s also friends with Wes Lane. Scary.

Update: Mike McCarville has scolded us a second time!  He even called us an “obscure local social blog.”  Awesome!!! 

23 Responses to “Meet Oklahoma’s most famous straight and celibate musician…”


  1. 1 Jack Bowen's wig

    He probably just has a wide stance like Larry Craig. Sort of Lonnie Latham kind of straightness.

  2. 2 stevo

    of course, mid 30s…music teacher…celibate..totally heterosexual.

    for shame, patrick. FOR SHAME!

  3. 3 bajaokie

    Gay or not, so what? Careful folks, you could be more like Sally than you realize.

  4. 4 Clark Matthews

    All I can say to Mike McCarville is: So’s yer face.

  5. 5 stevo

    Mike McCarville = next Justice League villain!!

  6. 6 Dylan

    Please write another story about Sally Kern. The past 15 stories weren’t enough!!

  7. 7 Common Sense

    If McCarville and Mark Shannon are scolding you, you must be doing something right.

  8. 8 Betnhi

    Mens restroom enthusiast.

  9. 9 Heath

    Hey, I like the B-52’s and Mint Milanos! … And so does my boyfriend!

  10. 10 Grendel

    I wish I were tall, thin, and neat, too.

  11. 11 SoonerDustin

    I worked with McCarville for 5 years. He was such a hoot. For two years he couldn’t remember my name. He’s just call me “big boy”.

    So you guys got him and Shannon upset with you? You have really outdone yourselves on this one.

  12. 12 alfalfa bill

    obscure local social blog = “i don’t understand what kids are talking about these days. perhaps we should arm them and send them to our universities, to protect our campuses from the gays.”

  13. 13 Lifetimesooner

    Well, even though I’m somewhat conservative I’ve always thought Mike McCarville was a nut anyway. I remember he used to have an on-line poll on KTOK with questions like: “Do you think kids bringing guns to school and shooting each other is bad?” if you pissed him off - more power to you!

  14. 14 Jack Bowen's wig

    The Lost Ogle just wishes they could do ads for a 10th rate broadcasting school!

  15. 15 SoonerDustin

    Listeners…”Do you think the lost Ogle is a obsure local social blog?” NEEEEEEEWWWWWWWSSSSSSSS Radio 1000 the K-T-O-K!

    My best McCarville I could do typing…

  16. 16 Grendel

    Listeners, am I a bigger douchebag than Dave Morris? Call in now!

  17. 17 Jack Bowen's wig

    Mike McCarville LOVES The Tin Drum!

  18. 18 src

    I have my Des Moines connections out and about but I’m afraid …… “you can’t handle the truth”.

  19. 19 Jane

    This is social?

  20. 20 lrng2luvlaw

    I think I went to undergrad with him….

  21. 21 Rusty

    I was one of those guys who isn’t gay once. I just liked having sex with other guys. And when I wasn’t doing that, I was celibate. There’s a big difference, right???

  22. 22 Soonerthought

    I felt the “Wrath of the Creaky Mr. McCarville”, too, for having the temerity to disagree with the Supreme Court. He called my blog “lightly read”. Ouch. With zingers like that I might need to get therapy. Or maybe he needs more Ensure.

  1. 1 Judgement Day at The Lost Ogle

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