Patrick On April - 26 - 2008

From tonight’s 6:00 pm broadcast at KOCO Channel 5. Please watch:

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There’s a little part of me that hopes Mr. Johnson is never caught, and that he goes on a notorious crime spree across the metro, burglarizing the lavish homes of local Gallardia residents, and causing old women to scream “My Jewels!” That would be awesome…just imagine how cool our nightly news would become and the the headlines that would appear in the Oklahoman when the OKCPD creates a special task force to track down the thief!

Anyway, if you have any info on Mr. Johnson’s wherabouts, please call crime stoppers…or any Metro Christie’s Toy box.

Categories: KOCO, Unusual

12 Responses

  1. ryan says:

    Imagine having to read that on air…

  2. Lifetimesooner says:

    It’s nice to know that I’m not the only sick bastard that caught this…..

  3. Your mom says:

    I heard he only has one eye.

  4. SoonerD says:

    His M.O is he strikes usually in the morning.

  5. The Don says:

    I usually like to shave the “gray hair and beard” disguise before I do any “burglaries”…if you know what I’m sayin

  6. mr. shain says:

    i showed this to all my friends in LA over the weekend–i love breaking stereotypes about OK.

  7. chekkie says:

    This could also account for the recent rash of burglaries where i live, Morningwood Estates…

  8. Gan M. says:

    I heard that his accomplices are a couple of nuts, and that his secret lair in next door to some asshole.

  9. Gan M. says:

    I heard that his accomplices are a couple of nuts, and that his secret lair is next door to some asshole.

  10. Okie Chris says:

    Wasnt that the guy from Happy Gilmore who got his hand eaten by an Aligator?

  1. [...] – He then went to see his friends from NONzine. Cardboard Jim writes erotica fiction for the NON under the pseudonym “Chubby Johnson.” [...]

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