Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Christina Fallin is single… again

We have learned through the Ogle Mole Network that Christina Fallin, an American consultant, artist and public figure (her words, not mine), is single again. Shocking, huh?

Her soon to be ex-husband Eric Smith filed for divorce in Oklahoma County on Thursday, November 29th. The filing comes less than six months after the couple eloped in Arkansas, and just eight months after Fallin’s marriage with indie rocker / Chanel obsessed hipster Matt Bacon was annulled in the Oklahoma courts. In case you’re keeping score at home, that’s two failed marriages in less than one year. Someone may want to inform Christina the “family” part in her mother’s campaign slogan is based on quality and not quantity.

Here are some tweets that OKC Thunder back-up center Hasheem Thabeet and Dean Blevins sent out regarding the news:

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Okay, those tweets are fake. You see, I used up all my Christina Fallin marriage, annulment and divorce jokes six months ago and couldn’t think of any new ones to write, so I went with the made-up tweet route instead. Sure, it’s kind of lazy, but who would have thought her second marriage would be shorter than the first? I didn’t conserve any material or plan ahead for that.

I did ask around the Ogle Mole Network to see what happened, and apparently the Smith – Fallins were not a very happy household. The couple and Smith’s 14-year-old son lived in a two bedroom, one bath apartment above the Pachinko Parlor Sara Sara cupcakes on 9th Street. The cramped spaces and abundant supply of overrated sushi led to a very short honeymoon period. Christina apparently didn’t want to change her partying ways, and Eric Smith, well, he’s just a weirdo who makes shitty cupcakes.

Anyway, I guess we should wish both Fallin and Smith the best of luck. Divorce sucks, even if you were married for less than six months and it feels more like a normal break-up than an actual divorce. Hopefully they both learned several lessons, with the most important one being to not elope in Arkansas with some eccentric weirdo hipster that you barely know.

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Comments

  1. I’m glad her mom doesn’t want to let the gays marry. It preserves the sanctity of marriage for people like her and her daughter.

  2. “The couple and Smith’s 14-year-old son lived in a two bedroom, one bath apartment above Pachinko Parlor.”

    Jesus, that poor kid.

  3. This reminds me of a guy I knew once that didn’t believe in premarital sex. Before his untimely death he was only married 8 times. And his mother wasn’t even a…. Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas.

  4. One thing I heard is that they got married because no one took their relationship seriously and they wanted to prove people wrong. Yea, you did exactly the opposite crazy lady!

  5. Wow, she had three attorneys file notices of appearance. I just love those FFV’s (Fallin Family Values.).

  6. So will she get this one annulled again? Isn’t there a limit to the number of annullments you can get in a 12 month period? Or is that waived if you are the daughter of Mary Fallin?

    I heard that a train wreck once stopped as it was going through Oklahoma just to look at the Oklahoma “first family”.

  7. I went to high school with Christina. You know, the one constant between then and now is that she always looks pissed off at something. Even in pictures in which her lips are pulled up, she looks like she’s kinda snarling. Guess that’s why she goes for the “smoldering” look all the time.

  8. “Remember kid, there’s heros and there’s legends. Heros get remembered, but legends never die.” – Babe Ruth in the sandlot

    Personally, I don’t feel as if there is a man/hipster that is bold/dumb enough to “pickle the beast” they call Christina “cotton candy hair” Fallin. What surprises me is there is a seemingly endless supply on mindless morons jumping the fence to try for legendary status..

  9. This girl is an embarassment to our state. Mom, tell her to get it together, send her to rehab, or hook her up with Wayne Coyne.

    • I suppose we are still paying for her health insurance since she is only 25, aren’t we, Mary? No telling how much that will cost us with the life she leads……

  10. Okay so how does she fill out her taxes? Married? Single? 50% married? How do they determine here income from the marrages? Confusing.

    • No class like Liz Taylor. More like Anna Nicole Smith, but again, shouldn’t disrespect Anna Nicole.

  11. even though shes a rebellious hipster odds are she’s still a southern evangelical by birth right. so shes probably not allowed to date for too long before getting married. poor girls just victim of her own demographic :[

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