Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Some idiot CBS Sports Radio blogger from Houston called a Thunder Girl “Chunky”

kelsey self

The girl pictured above is Thunder Girl Kelsey Self. This is her third year to wear skimpy clothes, white shorts and dance out of unison with other girls at The Peake. She’s an OU student, dance teacher, and when she grows up, she wants to edit a magazine.

Also, according to a blog post by “Claire Crawford” on CBS Sports Radio 610 in Houston, Kelsey may be “too chunky.” Check it out:

Is This Girl “Too Chunky” To Be An OKC Thunder Cheerleader?

The Rockets are facing the Oklahoma City Thunder during the first round of the NBA Playoffs. The Rockets looked terrible in Game 1, but some say they weren’t the only bad-looking people on the court.

We’re not trying to be ugly. We are just discussing what men like in women, specifically NBA cheerleaders.

This pretty blonde has been criticized by some folks in OKC for having “pudginess” around her waistline. But if she’s comfortable wearing that tiny outfit and dancing for NBA fans, then good for her.

Besides…not every man likes women to be toothpick skinny. In fact, I’d say most men prefer a little extra meat on her bones. Am I right?

What do you think? Is this chick “too chunky” to be a cheerleader?

Either way, I wish she had a little more up on top, if you know what I mean…

We think she’s beautiful. What do you think?

Yep, I’ll admit it. I was one of the thousands of people at Game 1 on Sunday night who criticized Kelsey for her “pudginess” and then complained about it to a Houston blogger. I mean, how could you not? Just look at the girl. She must be at least 115lbs. If she doesn’t watch out, she may balloon up to a size 4. Obviously, she hasn’t been participating in the pre-game throw-ups with all the other dancers.

In all seriousness, what a stupid article. Kelsey may not have the prototypical, A-list NBA dancer body, but other than old Honeybee Talor, who really does? Instead of responding to the absurdity of the post, or making fun of Houston for being the fattest city in America, I’m going to give a little word of advice to the blog’s author in the form of an open letter:

Dear Former Sports Radio 610 Intern Who’s Forced To Write Blog Posts Under The Pseudonym “Claire Crawford,”

I’ve been at this snarky blogging thing for almost six years now. Along the way, I’ve learned some tips and tricks when it comes to poking fun at people, places and organizations. Here are three general rules I always try and follow:

1) Unless she has been accused of a crime, attempted to sell children on Facebook, hangs out at the State Fair, or compared homosexuals to terrorists, try to avoid making fun of a female’s looks or physical appearance. Despite your best intentions, you’re basically just going to come across as an asshole. Sometimes that’s okay, but most of the time it should be avoided. I learned this the hard way back in 2008 when we asked our readers if they’d rather have drunk sex with an America’s Next Top Model or Biggest Loser contestant. We had to pull the post, apologize, all that other fun stuff that Sports Radio 610 is going to have to do later. Instead, go with the overly flattering route. For example, say a local meteorologist decides to get bangs that you’re not too sure about. Instead of making fun of her and the new look, glorify it instead. Not only is it the safe play, but it makes you feel good about yourself.

2) Don’t Piss Off Thunder Fans. Seriously, we’re like a cult. Rumble could hand out orange and blue cyanide Kool-Aid at the game tonight and we’d all drink it quicker than you can chant O-K-C. We make helicopter parents seem sane and grounded. If you come after one of us, you’re coming after all of us.

3) Don’t say mean things about someone on a blog that you wouldn’t say to them in person. Just kidding about that one.

Please take this free advice to heart and use it in the future. Good luck in your search for a new internship somewhere.

– Patrick

Update: Surprise, Surprise. In the time it took me to write this post, the article has been removed from the CBS Sports Radio Website. Of course, I wouldn’t be where I am today without taking a screen shot, right? Here it is:

OKC thunder girl chunky CBS houston

 

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Comments

  1. I really don’t like pointing out your typos anymore because they are so…you, but that “If you come after one of us, you’re coming after all of is” mistype reminded me of John Belushi’s rant about the Germans bombing Pearl Harbor.

    (Forgotten, you were on a roll!)

  2. As soon as I saw this article my first thought was, “How long till Patrick sees this and responds?” I guessed as soon as he finished one more bowl.

  3. Used to work there. Your real “Claire Crawford” is no other than their Director of Digital Content, Anna-Megan Raley.

  4. Weird…channel 4 has a story up with an image of the original story and it has the same exact date/time stamp as your screen shot.

  5. Wow, really? I don’t follow the Thunder and until this article hit facebook I didn’t even know they had these girls, cheerleaders.
    So was it a slow news day and nothing else to write or was the writer envious or jealous? There is NOTHING wrong with this young woman’s weight! I think she is far more attractive as far as her weight goes then those extremely skinny girls. Maybe they need to fatten up a little?

  6. Oh jeeeez. Circle the wagons OKC. Someone just called one of your cheerleaders fat. You guys really have a chip on your shoulder.

  7. Yes this is a stupid article. If you’re going to make fun of an Oklahoma cheerleader make fun of the ou tranny

    • Jealousy rears it’s ugly head! Another term for an ass hole is jealous stuck up Bitch,I think?

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