Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

About the drunk substitute teacher from Ada…

Michelle Childress 2

The lady pictured above is Michelle Childress. According to this report on KFOR.com, she’s being asked by a police officer why she decided to get drunk and sub a class.

This was her response:

Michelle Childress drunk

I don’t know about you, but I think I love this lady. If I were a substitute teacher, I’d drink every day. Granted, I already drink every day, but you get my point. Seriously, that would be one hell of a depressing job. You basically get paid something like $60 a day to be a glorified babysitter and just sit there and take it as kids run all over you. Of course, that doesn’t mean you can show up to school drunk. That takes some balls. Only students and janitors can get away with that.

Anyway, this isn’t the first time that Michelle has made the news. In 2008, she was profiled in the Ada Evening News after she appeared on the Dr. Phil show to talk about her phobia of watching fat people eat. And no, I’m not making that up.

From the Ada Evening News:

‘I don’t hate fat people!’

Adan appears on national TV show, tells her side

Ada — An Ada woman who was taped for the May 14 episode of “The Dr. Phil Show” says the show completely and purposely misrepresented her actual views. Michelle Childress claimed she was invited to be a guest of a show that would deal with personal phobias.

Instead she found herself on an episode entitled “I’m Hot, You’re Not!” She said her appearance and phobia were taken out of context, and that she was portrayed as a has-been beauty queen who hated obese people.

This all started in 2006. Childress replied to a message posted on the Dr. Phil website discussing phobias by relating one of her own. She wrote that since childhood, whenever she saw extremely large people eating a huge meal in a gluttonous way, it made her nauseous. “I get physically sick … I said that it makes me sick, and my mom has the same thing.” The same thing happens whenever she sees a mouse; physical sickness.

Childress said that she was just explaining her unique phobia online, and she wondered if there was anyone else out there that suffered from something similar. And that’s when someone from the website’s staff responded, assuring her there probably were, and that maybe Dr. Phil could help her overcome her ailment.

Childress said she’d never gotten the phobia diagnosed by an actual medical professional. “I’ve never really talked about it,” she said

She first became aware of the condition at a young age while in the company of her obese aunt and uncle, both of whom had voracious appetites. “It wasn’t like, you know, I didn’t love them,” she said. “I could hug them, I could be around them. It was just if they would eat, it would make me have to go to the bathroom and get sick.

Phil McGraw’s staff contacted Childress again and indicated they were eager to discuss her phobia.

Childress said staffers described the show as one that would focus on different people and their different problems. “So I thought ‘oh, I’ll do that,’ you know. It’s no big deal,” said Childress.

When a camera crew arrived to film Childress in her home, she said they coached her to repeat the questions they’d asked as answers. She said the camera crew was especially interested in getting her on film, saying “I hate fat people.”

Childress said while she obeyed early on in the shoot, she soon refused to say what the crew wanted.

“It was all deceptive,” she said. “It was all… I mean, it wasn’t like who I was.”

The camera crew also spotted framed pictures of Childress in the house of when she won the title of “Mrs. Ada” in 2002, and pictures from her younger days as a model.

Both Childress and her parent became suspicious when the camera crew insisted on seeing more of her modeling and pageant photos.

But they were assured by the camera crew that McGraw only wanted to see Childress on film and to see pictures of her at different times in her life to get a better idea of everything she’d accomplished over the years.

Well, at least this explains why she got drunk before subbing the class. She probably can’t deal with watching chubby kids stuffing their face with pizza and Funyuns.

By the way, here’s one of those old modeling photos:

michelle childress young

Ironically enough, young Michelle would probably throw up from watching older Michelle eat. Or after hearing she’d shown up drunk to school. One of the two. 

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Comments

  1. I think she had a manifestatio n obesophobia when she watched fat people eat. It is a fear of getting fat. I think she forgot that you if think about it long enough, you become the thing you fear. Karma.

    I know many good people who are obese. Some may eat too much, but only don’t get enough sleep and other produce too much cortisol because of how stressed they are.

  2. I knew it! Ana Nicole Smith faked her own death and moved to Oklahoma to be a slutty substitute teacher.

    Cue the Van Halen song!

  3. Did Joleen Cheney get a restraining order against TLO? You don’t give her love anymore!

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