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ICYMI

Here’s some renderings for a 30-story Tornado Tower

3:10 PM EST on February 26, 2015

Earlier this week, some architecture firm in Tulsa released some cool renderings for a 30-story "Tornado Tower" to be built near downtown Tulsa. It's part of the city's plans to make sure Tulsa is prominently featured in a 28th century episode of Ancient Aliens.

Here are a couple of pics:

tornado tower 2
tornado tower

A use for the building has yet to be determined, but possible options include a weather museum, tornado shelter or future tomb for Gary England. Of course, that's only if the tower ever gets built, which it won't.

Here are the details via KFOR:

There is a unique concept swirling around a piece of property in downtown Tulsa.

The architecture firm, Kinslow Keith and Todd Inc. was approached by Tulsa People Magazine to rejuvenate the property that is now a part-time parking garage into whatever they wanted.

They came up with the Tulsa Tornado Tower.

“No client at this point. It’s just a conceptual drawing of what could potentially take place and happen downtown.”

What originally started as a gag, quickly turned into a skyscraper unlike any other. With a purported height of 20 to 30 stories, its designed purpose is to be a severe weather museum. But Kinslow says since the tower is just a concept with no specific client, office space could easily be added.

Okay, so it's never going to happen. That's a relief. Can you imagine how annoying it would be to drive up to Tulsa each weekend to worship this thing? That would get old fast. I'm glad we can place it next to "The American," "2024 Olympics" and "Functional Street Grid" in the "Pipe Dreams That Will Never Happen In Tulsa" file.

That being said, please humor us...

“The project is very visible from all of the expressways in downtown. We thought this would be a very visible location.”

The proposed design has circulated on social media. And architect, Andrew Kinslow says the phone has been ringing off the hook at his office with potential investors wanting to learn more.

“How much would this cost to build?” one possible investor asked.

“We don’t know,” Kinslow laughed. “It’s very schematic at this point and is just a concept.”

The phone has been ringing off the hook with investors? Are we really supposed to believe that? Mike and Marla Morgan's real estate agents? Maybe. Stupid idiots? Perhaps. Investors? No way. You see, investors – at least the smart ones – like to put their money in things that are practical and make a return, like websites. These guys were probably getting calls from shady businessmen posing as investors that are trying to swindle naive architects.

Anyway, is there anything else we need to know about this non-news news item?

Kinslow and his firm have their first lunch meeting Thursday.

WTF, they haven't even had a lunch meeting yet? Are these guys even licensed architects or are they just a couple of computer design dropouts who smoke a lot of pot and play too much SimCity? Whatever it is, they may be geniuses. They should move down here, get Rand Elliot involved, score some TIF funds, pass a MAPS, and this thing will happen.

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