“She’s hot, but I wouldn’t date her. She used to date an athlete. Such a turnoff.” Athlete being an indirect way of saying a black guy.
Confederate flags hung in a few bedrooms of fraternity houses. When confronted, the owners typically spewed some rehearsed speech about how it represented “southern pride.”
One of my closest friends in college almost exclusively dated closeted gay frat boys. His relationships with these men were hidden; regulated to hushed phone calls and late night visits to his discretely located RA dorm room. Being seen in public together was out of the question, because they didn’t want to bear the scrutiny of being “that f—ing faggot” in their own home.
With anecdotes like this, you’re probably wondering why I’d admit to being in OU’s Greek system. But it wasn’t usually that bad. I also witnessed tremendous amounts of love and acceptance while I was a part of OU Greek life.
Freshman year, my then-boyfriend’s fraternity formed a close bond with the Sigmas, one of the historically black fraternities. For the rest of the year, they threw frequent joint parties. I still remember lining up in the halls of that frat house learning the “Cupid Shuffle” for the first time, making new friends and having the time of my life.
One year, I wanted to bring my mentioned gay friend to his first frat party. When we were having problems getting a wristband for him to board the bus, the fraternity’s president noticed our frazzled looks and brought us over a pair with a smile on his face. Throughout the day, three different guys from my friend’s hometown independently came up to him and said something along the lines of “sorry if I’ve ever been an asshole to you in the past.”
I guess you can say I’ve witnessed both the good and the bad of Greek life while I was at OU.
This is our chance to be radical and make a change for the better. Take a stand and make meaningful changes in our institution’s culture that impact students for decades to come. So how are other Greek houses handling the situation?
So maybe I’ve had a rough month at work. Or this whole post might be shameless click bait, I don’t know. Regardless, these people work alongside you every day and slowly peck at your sanity until you can stand it no more. You’re released from the fluorescent hell every Friday, and after what feels like about two hours, the cruel alarm of Monday’s terror signals. (In case you can’t tell, been cheated out of one too many snow days this year).
We all know these office dweebs. Let’s take it to the internet and talk some major shit.
1. The Brown Noser Girl
We hate this chick. She brings coffee to the boss and vehemently agrees with your doofus manager’s insane ideas. She’s responsible for holding up boring meetings and seminars by asking questions that start with “As a successful businessman like yourself, what advice would you…” You have no idea who included her in the group email about next week’s happy hour, but she “replies all” and asked to be removed from the thread because it’s not “work related.”
2. That Bad Joke Guy
Whether it’s for a Thunder game, a concert, a wedding, or a secret TLO hazing ritual, I make it down the Turner Turnpike to OKC for an overnight trip at least a couple times a year. Aside from bugging friends for suggestions, it’s hard to get a good answer on where to eat or what to do while in town for such a short period…
(Editor’s Note: We don’t have the heart to tell Chelsea about Yelp!)
Because I’m a considerate individual, I realize that this may happen to many of you when in Tulsa for a concert at Cain’s or a Tulsa Shock game (or okay, concerts at Cain’s). So here’s my out-of-towners guide to Tulsa, broken down by common situations you may find yourself in.
Before reading keep these rules in mind…
- All of these places are downtown/midtown. Why? Because I’m assuming you’re going to Cain’s, or the Brady, or the BOK, or the Center of the Universe festival, or a wedding at the Jazz Hall of Fame, Philbrook, or Mayo Hotel and not to a hospital. Also, if you wanted to visit South Tulsa, Broken Arrow/Jenks, you’d save a lot of gas money by visiting Edmond or northern Norman instead.
- This is the Lost Ogle, not the Yellow Pages. (Editor’s Note: We still don’t have the heart to tell Chelsea about Yelp!) We’re growing and thriving, not the other way around, so I’m going to list like 3-5 places, not every damn establishment within a 5 mile radius.
- This is a list geared towards people visiting from out-of-town. Yes, Jenks and Broken Arrow residents, this may apply to you, too. This isn’t just like, a list of all my favorite places (Editor’s Note: Thank God!). I considered the level of friendliness, convenience, and novelty before adding a place to this post.
With that out-of-the-way, let’s start with…
Where to go… if you’re trying to impress a lady friend with a nice dinner, celebrating a birthday, or suspect that you’re rich great Aunt Nelly is footing the bill.
Now that the smoke and mirrors of Madonna’s minotaur and Sia’s famous body double has dissipated, it’s finally time to discuss what really matters to us: which one of you has connections in the fashion world so I can steal Miley Cyrus’s sexy Alexandre Vauthier cutout dress that I saw on the runway and called she would wear last week.
Oh whoops. Sorry, I forgot this was a Lost Ogle post. Boobs girls Wayne Coyne sucks!
What I meant to say was, let’s discuss how Oklahomans fared at the 2015 Grammys.
We’ll start with Oklahoma’s favorite couple, Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert.
Come on people. I’ve said it before–Blake and Miranda are easily one of the most famous and most loved power couples in America. Why don’t they dress like it?
Blake, we get it. Like Doug Funny, you have your uniform and you apparently love it. That’s cool. You’d probably lose some dirt road cred if you started showing up to parties in velvet jackets and pointy shoes. So although Blake’s worn this outfit approx. 34294 times, I’d say he looks nice.
Miranda…girlfriend. Not that you don’t look beautiful–cause you do. Stunning as per usual. The make up, flawless. But I know how many plates full of fried chicken you’ve said no to in order to maintain that bangin’ body, and I know how many hours at the salon it takes to make your hair look that beautifully colored and artfully undone. Let’s be real, the dress is super boring. If it wasn’t for the pink embellishments, it could easily pass as a Dillard’s find. You can wear Dior, or Givenchy, or Chanel. The world is your oyster! Take advantage of this.
Also, I realize that showing up in matching outfits is so 90’s Brit and Justin, but it looks like Blake and Miranda came from two different places and just happened to bump into each other.
Miranda performed Sunday night and won Best Country Album. Here’s the video in case you missed it:
My favorite part of the performance was when she forgot she was on network TV and belted out a couple four letter words. It was the only time (at least that I noticed) the awkward silence of being censored. Kanye, you soft.
Next, our homegirl Carrie Underwood won Best Country Solo Performance with her song “Something in the Water.” She looked amazing as usual too:
It started off as a normal week on the Facebook front. When I scrolled through my timeline, it was your typical Facebook minutia–birthday wishes to people you hardly know, ignorant political propaganda dressed up as an overused internet meme, some nostalgic list about 90’s fad toys or television shows. But then something peculiar started popping up. Co-workers and people I went to high school with kept sharing some article about Tulsa being the default screen on Google Maps.
Uh, no shit Tulsa is our default location. Hulllooo brainless, we live here. Why are people acting like this is big news? Go back and take another stupid Buzzfeed quiz.
Well, it turns out I’m the one who’s actually the idiot. Last week, the people at Quartz solved this mystery that I never even knew was a thing:
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