I’m not much for Bible quoting, and I think that’s probably pretty obvious. I’m quicker to drop knowledge from an episode of Firefly than I am from the good book. But, as someone who majored in English, I know when life imitates literary art. Now, granted, it has taken me quite a few days to come to the full realization and understand the signs. But it hit me, just like the iPhone emergency alert that woke me up at 4:30 AM yesterday morning. We’ve got floods!
Now, this is probably obvious to everyone. Lake Arcadia is closed because the water is ten and a half feet above the normal level. My lawn is actually growing. There are stagnant puddles all over the place, and there is a general odor of rotting toads that seems to have taken over the mildewed carpets of Oklahoma. And, if I remember correctly from that one time I went to vacation Bible school with a friend back in the second grade, the only dude that knew what to do in a flood was Noah. And perhaps we should take our cue from him.
I’m not saying we need to gather up all the animals and put them on a boat. Quite frankly, if these floods take out the creepy possums and skunks in my neighborhood, well, then I’ll just take it as an act of evolution wherein it was time for those creatures to go. But before the flood waters take over the state completely, we should really gather up some keepsakes and put them in an ark (we can also use the speed boat that your uncle takes to Grand Lake every weekend, along with the jet skis if need be). After all, if we’re going to start with a fresh and clean Oklahoma after these waters clean our slate, we’ll want to have a few artifacts from the old world as we navigate the new one.
So, without further ado, here is the list of eight things from old Oklahoma that we need to bring to post-flood Oklahoma.
I’m going to tell you a whole bunch of things that you should do this weekend, but I know you guys are just going to stay at home in sweat pants and finish up watching Arrested Development. I won’t judge you for that. That’s pretty much what I plan on doing. So, while you spend the whole weekend trying to figure out what happened to Portia de Rossi’s face, just know that there are options outside your home and beyond Netflix, if you finally choose to get dressed and wash your face.
Anyway, here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town.
You probably wouldn’t know it from reading this blog, but we here at The Lost Ogle like laughter. Generally speaking, we are all for it. Awkward laughter, giggles, guffaws, chuckles–we like them all. Every once in a while, we like to laugh for a good cause, you know, when we aren’t laughing at the expense of others. This weekend, we’ll be laughing with you, instead of at a public figure.
Oak City Comedy Initiative, OKC comedy, Oklahoma City Improv and Red Dirt improv are getting together to put on a show to raise money for tornado relief. For the awesome price of free, you get stand up, improv, and short films. Donations will be taken at the door and throughout the night, and 100% of donations collected will go to the Oklahoma City Community Foundation.
There has been no shortage of news stories following last week’s tornado outbreak. Patrick and I decided to take a look back at 10 lasting images, memes, things, moments, etc. that we’ll always remember from the May 19th and 20th tornadoes.
1. That lady finding her dog in the rubble
The video is touching, moving and makes everyone cry. The woman even drops a couple of quotes that would make a playwright jealous. Still, whenever I watch the clip, I want to reach through the screen and yell to the news crew THAT YOU’RE FILMING A HUMAN BEING!!!! THIS ISN’T WILD KINGDOM WHERE YOU LET NATURE PLAY ITS COURSE. PUT DOWN THE STUPID MICROPHONE AND CAMERA AND HELP THE LADY RESCUE HER DOG FROM THE PILE OF HEAVY DEBRIS!!! Sorry, needed to get that off my chest. – Patrick
2. Aerial images of Moore on Monday, May 20 at 3:35 PM
The moment the tornado had passed, I don’t think anyone could believe what they were seeing. The wreckage is still just as shocking as it was over a week ago. – Marisa
I think Kevin Ogle spoke for all of us at the 2:55 mark. – Patrick
It’s Memorial Day weekend, and we have a very special edition of Friday Night in the Big Town for you, and we’re not talking about signed copy of the Gary England biography. Though, if you have one of those, we’ll totally buy it off you, for like, $20. Anyway, the reason this is a special edition is because we are featuring upcoming tornado relief events. Now, of course you can just donate money or supplies in whatever fashion you choose. But I know you guys. You like a party, or at the very least, an activity that might involve beer. And I’ve got you covered.
Here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town.
Oh hey, readers! Guess what? It’s Friday again. And that means it’s another day for you to half-ass until 5 PM so you can have a weekend. You know, as someone who has been at a full-time gig for the past three months, I can truly say that weekends are better than I’ve given them credit for. Who knew that two little days could feel so good? In order to maximize the party, I’ve made a list of things for you to do. They are guaranteed to be fun, and way better than what you would be doing if I left you to your own devices.
Anyway, here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town.
Fun fact about our Tony: He’s a huge Jerry Seinfeld fan. In fact, when I got an email about advanced ticket sales and didn’t tell him about it until a week later, I thought he was going to hit me. So there’s a good chance that our Tony will be there this evening, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he turned into a total fanboy and shrieked and cried when Jerry took the stage. Tony will basically be like a 13-year old girl at a One Direction concert.
Well, readers, what can I say about Jerry Seinfeld other than he’s hilarious and has influenced the majority of TLO writers in some way or another. In my heart, I hope this show is him wearing Levi’s 501s with a t-shirt and blazer in front of a fake brick wall while that signature Seinfeld music plays. I’m sure that’s not what it’s going to be. But a girl can dream.
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