By now, I’m sure you’ve read or heard about Richard Glossip, the man who is scheduled to be put to death on September 16. If by some weird chance you haven’t heard about him, here’s the CliffNotes version:
Glossip has been on death row since 1998. Two separate juries have found him guilty of hiring Justin Sneed, a man currently serving a life sentence, of murdering their then-boss, Barry Van Treese. Sneed is the one who beat Van Treese to death, and in exchange for a life without parole sentence, he was given his life sentence in exchange for testimony against Glossip. Since the murder of Barry Van Treese, Glossip has maintained his innocence.
If you’ve read anything about Glossip, you can feel like you don’t know the real story. Some news outlets maintain his innocence. Some news outlets point out glaring errors in the justice process. And some news outlets point out the media bias in their portrayal of Glossip as innocent.
Whatever you believe, one thing is certain. At the center of the controversy has been our fair Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin. She is one of the few people who had the power to slow down the process and make 99% sure we’re executing a guilty man, but for some reason she’s done nothing. With Glossip’s execution coming up, we decided to examine 7 reasons why:
1. Remind the rest of the country that we love executing people.
It’s been a while since every national left-leaning news outlet has written about the horribly cruel death of Clayton Lockett. Maybe Mary Fallin wants to give them something else to write about?
2. She wants to see if the new execution cocktail works.
You know, because she hasn’t really concerned with how barbaric the state’s past attempts at executing a prisoner have been.
3. She can’t cave to Hollywood outsiders like Susan Sarandon.
Admittedly, I don’t know much about country music that was created after 2001. That’s when I got my driver’s license and no longer had to ride in the car with mom who catered to my brother’s taste in music rather than mine, because my brother is the favorite. Regardless, all I know about country music these days is that Taylor Swift no longer qualifies for that category, and basically the whole scene is full of bros who like to sing about girls in tight jeans and getting drunk at the end of a dirt road in a pickup.
Oh, and I guess I know that Blake Shelton is on The Voice and he likes to say “bitch” at the end of his tweets. Apparently, this is why people think he’s qualified to read to preschoolers.
According to KFOR.com:
Good morning and happy Tuesday that feels like a Monday, everyone! With any luck, you enjoyed a well-deserved day off. Ironically, though, if you happen to be in a career for which the Labor Day holiday was initially created, you probably had to work. Is that irony, or the new American dream? Who knows? What I do know is that I hope you at least got to sit down and relax and enjoy a beer. Or, maybe hit the lake one last time, if you’re the lake type. If you’re like me, then your day was spent recovering from all the terrible junk you ate during the OU game. Because they don’t make Tums or Zantac strong enough to handle the chili cheese nachos, wings, and three-meat pizza multi-day heartburn I’ve got going on here.
Anyway, as always, I’ve gathered up the best tweets from the previous week. Check them out after the jump!
In life, there are few constants. You can’t count on much, but what you can always count on is food. It’s always there for you. It’s a better friend than anyone you know. Food doesn’t judge you when you’ve had a rough day and all you want is some dang cheese fries to cheer you up. Food is always there when you need something to let you know that everything is going to be okay. At least, I thought food would always be there.
If you know me at all, then you know one of my hobbies is to stop at a 7-Eleven and purchase a pint of Blue Bell ice cream. (Red velvet and blackberry cobbler are my favorites because I’m one of those weirdos who isn’t that into chocolate.) But I haven’t been able to do that for a long time since Blue Bell recalled their ice creams and shut down production. But according to KFOR.com, I should be able to take up my old hobby again:
Thank goodness for Uber, you guys. I like living in a world where if I’ve maybe had one too many drinks at dinner, I can just hit a couple of buttons on my smart phone and arrive home relatively safely. And more importantly, I like know that other people who may have had too much to drink at dinner also have this option. The more drunk drivers that are kept off the roads, the better.
And if you aren’t a fan of Uber, at least have a designated driver. Just, you know, make sure that your designated driver is 1.) sober, and 2.) of legal driving age. Otherwise, you may run into an issue. According to KFOR.com:
Thanks! Your message has been sent!