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The Oklahoma Gazette is desperate and thankful…

wayne coyne gazette

Back in October, we called out the Oklahoma Gazette for thinking Wayne Coyne is still cool and respected and for putting him on their front cover.

Here’s how I closed the post:

Is anyone else getting concerned about the Gazette? It used to be one of my favorite things to read, but over the past few years it’s really gone downhill. It’s totally lost its edge. It reminds of that cool older cousin we all had as kids. You know, the graphic designer who worked for an ad agency, lived downtown and had the awesome CD collection, but then went out and grew up, got married, had kids and is now so out of touch with the music scene that he or she thinks Wayne Coyne is still cool.

The Gazette took the jab pretty well. If anything, I bet they appreciated the heads up. “Wayne Coyne isn’t cool anymore? Who knew?!” They sent me this funny pic as a response, and then about a week later, the weekly’s staff writer, Ben Felder, sent me the following request:

I have been tasked with the cover for Thanksgiving. I am trying to avoid the standard “Thankful for OKC” stuff and have put together a small group of OKC residents who are each giving me a reason they are thankful to call Oklahoma City home, but the answers are meant to be more creative and quirky than the typical “I’m thankful for good people and cheap gas.” In fact, some of the answers are kind of backhanded complements to the city. I’d like to have you be one of the people we use in the story.
If you are open to it, here are two things we would need….
1) At some point I would interview you about your reason(s) you are thankful for OKC. Remember, anything goes and it would be expected that you are in full Lost Ogle form.
2) We are getting a photo of each person with something related to thanksgiving. I have a person eating a turkey leg, an artist with a crappy turkey painting, etc… For you, I’d like for you to wear a turkey costume we have, standing there with a deadpan look. If you’re game, that would be our cover. I think it would be funny and would help us tap into Thanksgiving without being too cliche. We have the costume and would shoot it here at our studio.

Yes, the Gazette wanted to run a non-cliché Thanksgiving story by having people share the reasons they are thankful to live in Oklahoma City. No cliché there! It’s about as original as a “Best Of” or “40 Under 40″ feature. Maybe in December they’ll have a few residents share their Christmas wishes for the city.

Actually, I was flattered by the Gazette’s request. It’s an honor that the local alternative weekly – in a sly, passive aggressive attempt to get even with me for my digs and criticism – wanted to dress me up in a turkey costume and make me look like a fool on their front cover. I agreed to participate and wear the costume, but on one table-turning condition…

I’ll do it… but only if I get to wear the Wayne Coyne Halloween Mask…

Here’s the deal. I’m a control freak, asshole, and protective of our weird little brand. If you’re going to make me the butt of a joke on your cover, you’re going to be part of it. I thought wearing the ridiculously out-of-touch mask would be a good, semi-funny comprise, and make light of the frenemy relationship / sibling rivalry with have the Gazette.

Surprisingly, Ben agreed:

Wearing the Coyne mask would actually be pretty funny. Do you have any time to come by the office Monday afternoon or Tuesday morning?

In all honesty, I was shocked. The Gazette really agreed to something like that? I thought they lost their sense of humor years ago. What’s next? Funny, snarky opinion columns? Food reviews that are actually critical? Bringing back the angry old man who wrote the movie reviews? Maybe times are changing.

The following Monday, I stopped by the Gazette offices on 36th and Shartel for the photoshoot. Ben Felder and the paper’s photographer, Mark Hancock, took me to a back room where a huge turkey costume was waiting. I looked around and didn’t notice the Wayne Coyne mask anywhere, so I asked:

“Did you all cut out a Wayne Coyne mask?”

There were a few seconds of awkward silence. Mark, the photographer, then nervously spoke up and said something like “Haha, yeah, we’ll have to do a couple of shots with that. That will be funny.”

I then replied with a “Well, I hope so, because I’m only doing this if I get to wear the Wayne Coyne Halloween mask.”

At that point, the look on Ben’s face kind of mimicked Munch’s Scream. He explained that he thought I was joking. He and Mark then spent a couple of minutes trying to convince me that appearing on the cover of a fledgling alternative weekly dressed up in a turkey costume would be funny and great publicity for the website. I wasn’t having any of it.I shook their hands, half apologized for the “mix-up,” and went home.

I’m telling you this drawn out, boring story because the Gazette’s “Non-Cliche” Thanksgiving issue came out today. Let’s see who they duped into dressing up in a turkey costume for the front cover. I bet it was either Wayne Coyne, Hipster Boo Boo or a ginger. Those people will do anything for attention and have no self-awareness.

10 Oklahoman Reporters, Now and Then…

grumpy catgrumpy cat

The buzzfeedification of NewsOK.com is not slowing down.

Over the weekend, the website published a list of “10 Famous Oklahomans, Then and Now.” Just like other recent clickbait attempts, such as the sappy “5 Things Only Oklahomans Would Understand” and incredibly boring “10 Facts About Oklahoma You Might Not Have Known,” the article has been plastered all over NewsOK.com and has received 40,000 views in the last 24 hours.

Since we also want to get a lot of page views, we decided to come up with a list of “10 Oklahoma Reporters, Now and Then.” It’s LOL adorable.

The post is part of our renewed commitment to ridicule and mock the The Oklahoman whenever possible. I think we’re going to do something like this as a response to all their awful clickbait, so next week when you see a post on here titled “10 Oklahoma Country Musicians Who Don’t Look Like Cats” or “You Won’t Believe What Happens When This Dog Reads a Jenni Carlson Column,” you’ll understand why.

Anyway, to the post. Here are 10 Oklahoman Reporters, Now and Then…

berry tramel before and after

10. Boomer (Berry) Tramel

According to sources, Boomer Tramel didn’t smoke a lot of pot in college. He’s just one of those guys who permanently looks, acts, thinks, and speaks like he just rolled a joint in a gas station bathroom.

Tony Casillas is finally out at 107.7 The Franchise…

tony casillas

When 107.7 The Franchise launched last fall, their big hire was former Sooner great Tony Casillas. Matched up in the afternoon drive against Traber and Eschbach on The Sports Animal, he was going to bring a different style of sports talk to Oklahoma City radio. As billboards and bus benches around town told us, it was going to be some “Sports Talk with Balls.”

Unfortunately, someone forgot to put some air in those balls, because Tony Casillas was incredibly flat. He had the energy of a Koala and the vocabulary of a football player. His radio show was about as fun as wearing wet socks. If Regular Jim Traber is the radio equivalent to watching a train wreck, then Tony Casillas is like being stopped at a railroad crossing during rush hour in Edmond.

With Casillas now going back to living off the millions he made as a professional athlete, The Franchise has made some changes to their lineup and moved some people around. The most noticeable is promoting former Oklahoma State offensive lineman Sam Mayes to the coveted 3pm – 6pm slot.

Yes, you read that right, the flagship radio station for Sooner athletics is going to have an OSU homer lead their programming. As Mike Gundy would say, that makes me wanna puke.

Here is Sam’s tweet about the news:

The Oklahoman is documenting its own sad, inevitable demise…

Apparently, the editors of The Oklahoman get a kick out of watching their own funeral.

Last week, “The State’s Most Oldest News” debuted a new series where they pick 11 lucky subscribers to have donuts and coffee with The Oklahoman editor, Kelly Dyer Fry, and discuss the newspaper.

Well, at least that’s what they claim is going on. I bet the whole thing was just a lure to pre-sell obituaries. As we know, The Oklahoman will do just about anything for extra cash. Just check out the photo:

oklahoman subscriber

You know how law firms will sometimes use a cliché line like “Our attorneys have over 300 years combined experience in banking law.” Well, those 11 Oklahoman subscribers have about 700 years experience reading the newspaper.

Seriously, no wonder the newspaper industry is dying. When your customer base is composed of people who write checks, watch CSI and still have landline telephones, you may have some problems. I can’t tell if they’re talking about newspapers or conducting a focus group for Polident.

If you want to see something even more depressing than this photo, check out this video NewsOK.com put together about the event. They even converted it into black and white to mimic the old talkies their readers watched as kids.

The best part, and I’m not joking, is where Jenni Carlson’s mom chimes in to say: “I like Jenni Carlson real well… I just like how she says things.”

Check it out:

Steve Shaw had a Facebook malfunction…

steve shaw

I don’t know what it is, but I kind of like News 9’s Steve Shaw. Sure, he’s over-the-top, obnoxious, dramatic, and louder than an AWACS flying over Midwest City, but aren’t we all when we drink 10 Red Bulls in one day?

Seriously, how can you not like Steve? He’s what happened when the weird chubby kid who played with Tonka trucks grew up and became a news reporter. When Steve’s not working, I imagine him sitting at the end of a bar with his tie loosened, sipping on cheap whiskey while humming Van Halen songs and occasionally bragging out loud to no one in particular about the time he stole Dean Blevins’ Smart Ones.

Actually, I’m just joking. I doubt Steve really stole Dean’s frozen dinner. I think the only thing Steve has ever stolen from Dean is a penchant social media gaffes.

For example, check out what he put on Facebook on Saturday.