In this week’s Halloween issue, the once proud Oklahoma Gazette printed a gigantic green Wayne Coyne mask on the magazine’s front cover. It’s the perfect Halloween costume for people who like to cheat on their wives, snort blow with 18-year-olds and /or draw rainbow vaginas on notebook paper with highlighters.
Seriously, a Wayne Coyne mask? If the Gazette was doing that in an ironic, condescending way, that would be kind of cool, but they’re not. They’re just maintaining the magazine’s long-lasting tradition of kissing Wayne’s ass whenever possible.
Check it out…
I think we know who Marla Morgan is going to hire the next time her husband needs a weather helper.
Over the weekend, Facebook weatherman Aaron Tuttle shared a Halloween costume pic on his Facebook page. It’s of him and his girlfriend(?) before they ruined someone’s costume party.
Fortunately, he wasn’t crying:
Yes, Aaron Tuttle and his girlfriend She-Ra went out as a couple of spray tan models for Halloween. I guess that’s cool, although Aaron is violating a couple of man rules, including…
1. Never dress up like a douche bag for Halloween. It’s a holiday for girls to dress slutty, not for you to get free admission to the COPA.
2. Never date a girl who can put you to sleep with a full nelson. Or beat you at Mercy.
In addition to posting the blatant “LOOK AT HOW AWESOME I LOOK!” photo, Aaron left the following rambling, self-congratulatory, promotional note:
And I thought mispronouncing the word “Grotto” on a national radio show was going to be the highlight of my weekend.
Yesterday afternoon, while you were watching football or enjoying the record-breaking October heat, Marla Morgan, the wife of KFOR Chief Meteorologist Mike Morgan, chugged a bottle of Relax and sent us another email.
Here’s what the former Miss Rodeo USA had to say:
I’m still basking in the afterglow of being your recent Hot Girl Friday (HGF)….I can’t tell you how many doors it has opened and closed for me. I’m about to start calling you “Hef!”
Since you really do need updated pic’s, I thought I would send you a few of me without makeup from this past weekend…..besides being GREEN, do you know what I am? Here is a hint: I like your picture of extra large….um….brains from Star Trek and I love the best James T. Kirk of all time, William Shatner….I would be his squeeze.
Happy Halloween, and you know, once you go green, you never go back!
Uhm, will you all please add “Mike Morgan’s Basement” to the list of places to look if I ever turn up missing? Seriously, I’m pretty fucking terrified that I’m going to be kidnapped and end up in there, and I’m even more terrified that I don’t know who’s going to be responsible for it. Will it be Mike, Marla or will they co-conspire and pay Reed Timmer to do it? The only thing that’s certain is that they’ll use Emily Sutton as a lure.
Anyway, let’s check out these pics that Marla emailed to us.
The Josh Cockroft plagiarism scandal – sure, we’ll be all legitimate and call it a scandal – is the gift that keeps on giving.
If you remember correctly, we told you a few weeks ago that State Rep Josh Cockroft plagiarized portions of a Heritage Foundation abstract for a blog post on his website. The following week, we learned that Cock’s local newspaper – The Tecumseh Times – republished the same blog post as a newspaper op-ed.
Here’s our write-up about fiasco. It included a few lazy zingers aimed towards the newspaper:
Last Thursday, we told you that arts-hating, Batman suit-wearing, Derplahoman State Representative Josh Cockroft blatantly plagiarized excerpts of a 2013 Heritage Foundation article for an anti-gay marriage blog post that he wrote for his website.
Thanks to the Ogle Mole Network, we’ve now learned the same piece was also published in the print edition of the Tecumseh Countywide News, which is apparently Pottawatomie County’s leading source of plagiarized news and opinion…
After seeing [the column], I played the role of legitimate journalist and called the Tecumseh Countywide News for comment. Here’s what a spokesperson said:
“We are aware of it and we’re working with Representative Cockroft on the issue.”
The person on the phone wouldn’t elaborate any further, so we don’t know what type of work they’re going to do with Cockroft. Maybe they’ll help him uncover more obscure abstracts and columns to plagiarize, or perhaps get a Tate Publishing ghostwriter from the Philippine’s to handle his future writing duties. Better yet, they could also go with one of those clickbait content farms that are all over the web. If Cockroft’s next blog post is about the “8 Most Dangerous Towns In HD27″ or a round-up of “12 Cat GIFS That Will Make You Want To Eliminate Public Arts Funding,” you’ll know something is up.
Okay, that’s not too bad. I made a few digs at the newspaper and then closed it with an absurdist idea where we have Josh Cockroft hire Ryan Tate to ghostwrite his future plagiarized blog posts and newspaper columns. It could have been meaner, right? Just ask Ryan Tate, who is currently writing a new book about blowing goats at the Lake Hefner Canal.
In response to our blog post, the Tecumseh Times editor / publisher Wayne Trotter (this sweet little old man) published an editorial in this week’s paper praising us for our investigative journalism skills.
Via the Tecumseh Times:
Before we get too far into this editorial, we want to thank the website which calls itself The Lost Ogle for finding and revealing the remarkable similarities between a column written by Rep. Josh Cockroft and an article previously authored by Ryan T. Anderson of the Heritage Foundation, a conservative think tank. We published the Cockroft version of that opinion piece and we probably wouldn’t have known about this situation if The Lost Ogle hadn’t gotten on the case. We needed to know and we appreciate the website’s good work in uncovering and reporting on just how much alike those two columns are.
Why thank you, man who calls himself Wayne Trotter! We appreciate the kind, extremely gentle words. Hopefully our little shots at your paper didn’t ruffle any feathers. There’s no possible way you could have known Cockroft was that big of a weasel.
As a result of what The Lost Ogle reported, Gloria Trotter, co-publisher of The Countywide & Sun, contacted Rep. Cockroft and was given an explanation that appears elsewhere on this page. It is up to each individual reader to decide whether his explanation is acceptable. Our position is simply that we want work that appears under any writer’s name in our columns to be original. Period. That’s the way it always has been and as long as we’re running this newspaper, that’s the way it always will be. We’re confident people around here know that.
Yes, it’s “up to each individual reader to decide” if Cockroft’s inconceivable excuse is legitimate or not. Translation: The Tecumseh Times knows Cockroft is a liar, too! That’s hysterical, but I understand why they can’t just come out and say it.
Anyway, take a look at what other nice things Mr. Trotter and the Tecumseh Times has to say about us…
During our state’s most recent bout of Islamaphobia, Moore Police held a much-hyped press conference to warn the public that an Arab man with a thick accent was probably scouting out Moore High School for an ISIS-inspired terrorist attack.
Here’s KOKH Fox 25′s coverage of the event:
Police are searching for a man who they say walked into a Moore school and started asking “suspicious” questions.
Moore Police say security at Moore High School needs to be discussed because the door the man entered was left open and the incident wasn’t reported till two days later.
In a press conference on Wednesday, police said a man with a thick Arabic accent walked into Moore High School last Monday and asked a teacher and two students questions, though no word on what those questions were.
Police say the man got in through the performing arts door, went straight to cafeteria and spoke to the students.
He was in building only few minutes, police say.
Witnesses describe the suspect as an Arab man in his 40′s, about 5’7 to 5’8 with salt and pepper hair.
Anyone with any information is asked to contact police.
Not too long after the press conference and immediate red alert local media hysteria, the man in question was tipped off by a friend that “Hey, you’re a terrorist and the police are looking for you.” Surprisingly, he then contacted and met with police, and was eventually cleared of any wrongdoing.
Apparently, he wasn’t an Arab or terrorist at all. He’s just your everyday US citizen from India who shows up for TV interviews wearing knockoff Beats, Oakley sunglasses and an Heisenberg-inspired fedora. The only missing was a bluetooth earpiece:
Yep, that’s the guy. His name is McKesh Dadwal. In his interview with Channel 25, he explains why he was casually hanging out a high school in the middle of the afternoon asking students “suspicious” questions:
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