David Payne’s Radar Dong Won Yesterday’s Severe Weather Coverage…

May 21, 2019
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by Patrick

The apocalyptic severe weather event that struck Oklahoma yesterday kind of reminds me of the final season of Game of Thrones. They were both overhyped and they both under-delivered, but we all watched anyway. Hell, at one point I expected Gary England to sneak onto the News 9 set and stab David Payne in the heart, and then see Payne’s screamin’ eagle, Vortices, scorch Nex-Gen radar with one long breath of hail fire.

But, alas, that didn’t happen. The most exciting part of last night’s weather coverage had to be David Payne fending off this epic radar dong as it flew across Oklahoma City.

We’ve shared a lot of severe weather dongs over the years. Although the dong appears to be weakening as it hits a cold front, this could be the best one ever. Not only does it look like God (or Serge Ibaka) appeared on radar and took a gigantic piss on Jones, but I really like David Payne’s gray camouflage weather suit. It matches the News 9 weather map perfectly!

Another similarity between yesterday’s urgent, level 5, pink-bubbles-all-over-the-map PDS weather event and Game of Thrones is that they both delivered mixed—if not primarily negative—reactions on social media.

Where Game of Thrones fans couldn’t believe showrunners decided to boil five seasons worth of deep, nuanced material into a cliche-driven, logic-defying, six-episode montage of head-scratching plot points, lots of residents in the OKC metro TV viewing audience couldn’t believe we, once again, shut down schools and businesses for what turned out to be a run-of-the-mill, late-May mix of heavy rain, flash-flooding and a few isolated tornadoes.

I understand the anger. I think it’s absurd that most metro school districts closed for Monday on Sunday night, but can you really blame them, when the for-profit media shares doomsday stuff like this?

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TLO Restaurant Review: Taqueria Rafita’s

May 21, 2019
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by Louis Fowler

On the edge of a rapidly gentrifying Classen Ten-Penn sits one of the mejor taquerias in town, Taqueria Rafita’s, 1222 N. Penn. Holding on tight for a few years now, Rafita’s has steadfastly maintained its own dominant personalidad as the area has mostly changed and gained more CBD shops than I can count on both hands.

Additionally, it’s not that far from my house when I want to make quick lunch plans, as I did when I rode my bike to meet an old friend visiting from Dallas there last week. Typically on these noon-time jaunts I enjoy their casi perfecto milanesa tortas and hand-cut fries, but, looking over the tarpaulin menu on the wall, this time I was charmed enough to try Rafita’s own creation, the California Burrito ($12.00).

Man, I wish they all could be California Burritos.

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Weekend News Recap

May 20, 2019
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by Lucas

It’s a full moon tonight. Last night at least, and maybe the damn thing is waning or waxing or does whatever it does when it goes from being bright to barely visible, but it was a big ol’ dang ol’ moon. There’s also another bright spot, Mercury or Mars or some other distant astrological object that, as I’m told these days, has a direct bearing on my behavior and personality. Whatever it is, I can see it clearly outside, and it’s clinging lifeless in a vacuum abyss, following patterns of gravity around a dying sun in a dead and airless orbit.

I’ve been a big bummer all day. I woke up after just a few hours of sleep to help lead the first leg of a Critical Mass event in central OKC. The idea was to give visibility to cyclists and show that we deserve space alongside cars…

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Rattlesnake Shake: A Visit to the OKC Rattlesnake and Venom Museum

May 20, 2019
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by Louis Fowler

I received a text a couple of days ago from a friend asking if I heard about the new python that the Oklahoma City Rattlesnake Museum recently acquired. My answer was, of course, no, followed by an exasperated “Oklahoma City has a rattlesnake museum?”

As I soon learned, yes, Oklahoma City sure does, and man, is it the scariest fucking place on Earth.

Located where you’d expect—1501 S. Agnew—near both Cattleman’s Steakhouse and Cattleman’s Liquor Store, the unassuming red-brick building, which from the outside looks like every other industrial building along the block, is transformed into a living Alice Cooper album when the threshold is crossed, with tattered snake-skins nailed to the walls right next to old toys like spider-eggs and finger-snakes.

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David Boren Lackey Named Interim OU President…

May 17, 2019
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by Patrick

Late last night while you were probably sleeping or drunk texting, the University of Oklahoma Board of Regents announced that law school dean – and former David Boren staffer – Joseph Harroz, Jr. drew the short stick and will be the school’s new interim president.

In his new role, Harroz will more than likely…

A) Help the university rebuild and regroup after Jim Gallogly’s 10-month reign of terror.

B) Work to rebuild trust with students, faculty and alumni.

C) Try to figure out a way to halt, cover up or brush under the rug the university’s investigation into David Boren’s sexual misconduct allegations.

Here are more details via Tulsa World:

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Weekend Radar

May 17, 2019
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by Jenn J

Your most trusted-trusted source  for  all-things Oklahoma City is back with its weekly feature, TLO  Weekend Radar, highlighting a few of the most promising happenings in the metro. This weekend’s edition is brought to you by our partners on OKC Energy FC.

This weekend you can watch butterflies get their asses kicked, get real buzzed one ounce at a time and experience time travel all the way back to 1990.

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Cal’s Corner: Inside OU’s Ongoing Soap Opera

May 16, 2019
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by Cal Hobson

For the better part of a year, a relentless drama has played out at The University of Oklahoma. Salacious allegations of sexual misconduct against former OU President David Boren. An investigatory expose that makes the Trump-Russia dossier look rudimentary, by comparison. Boren’s resignation and replacement by business tycoon, wealthy OU alum and donor James Gallogly. Gallogly’s unbreakable streak of headline-creating guffaws, as he endeavored to erase Boren’s legacy. And, now, Gallogly has resigned.

We’ve all seen the headlines, but what’s really going on behind the scenes and beneath the surface?

How in the world did this S.N.A.F.U. (Situation Normal, All Fucked Up) ever get to this point — with so much damage imposed on so many; supported by so little evidence; offered by such questionable characters; and paid for by you and me, the also-victimized tax payers?

What follows is my answer to those questions. And when all this peters out, my version will be closer to the truth than most.

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