Worst of OKC: Suburb

We took a little break from the “Worst of OKC” for Labor Day. We only have six categories left, so be sure to vote and vote well. The nominees for worst suburb are after the jump.

Bethany

If you read this site regularly, you’ll know that I’m not a big fan of Bethany. In fact, we ranked the city number 30 on our 2007 list of the Top 100 Oklahoma Embarrassments. Here’s what we wrote back then.

If you are a fan of the City of Bethany, you are probably here because:

a: Your pastor wanted you to see the evils of the Internet, or
b: You Googled something like “Sad Oklahoma Towns”, “Nazarene Hot Spots” or “Where to meet boring white religious people in Oklahoma City.”

If you chose “A”, you probably live in Bethany. If you chose “B”, you should probably live in Bethany. If you chose both, you should probably just close the browser, order some Swadley’s and watch KSBI Channel 52 for the rest of the day or night. Because in Bethany, that’s about all there is to do.

Yeah, I’d say that still rings true today. The only difference is that my parents now live in Bethany. Ugh.

Del City

Del City is such a bad place to live that even people from Midwest City are scared to drive there. The only things to do in Del City are steal a car, mug someone or get out of Del City.

Edmond 

If you’re an affluent white person with smiley kids, golden retrievers and a fondness for traffic, Edmond would be your type of town…in 1996. Sure, a bunch of doctors, lawyers, dentists and energy company executives still call the suburb home, but more and more of these people are moving to areas like Deer Creek or Guthrie or far Northeast Oklahoma City. It’s like Edmond has become an upper-middle class purgatory for white people. Unless, of course, you are a student or live near the railroad tracks. Then you are just poor.

Moore

Moore is kind of like South Oklahoma City on steroids and with a new hair cut. Yeah, it’s not a bad place to live, and yeah, it looks better than South Oklahoma City, but deep down, it’s still pretty much South Oklahoma City.

Mustang

I always get Yukon and Mustang confused. They are both west of Oklahoma City, both have red high school uniforms and both smell like manure. I think Mustang is the bad one, because when I was in high school the Mustang girls were prudes, while the Yukon girls would totally let you touch their boob on a first ‘date.’ Of course, none of them had a thing on Piedmont girls. The only thing easier than a Piedmont girl is spaghetti.

Worst of OKC: Worst Suburb

  • Del City (41%, 369 Votes)
  • Edmond (28%, 248 Votes)
  • Bethany (14%, 124 Votes)
  • Moore (14%, 122 Votes)
  • Mustang (5%, 41 Votes)

Total Voters: 901

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