Last week, this photo of a sad Oklahoma grandpa who is either A) a really poor planner, B) a really bad cook or C) has some really terrible grandkids destroyed the Internet. If you just arrived from the future in a time machine and missed the story, here’s a screenshot:
180,000 re-tweets and 296,119 likes? That’s almost as ridiculous as cooking 12 gigantic hamburgers for six grandkids! Seriously, look at the size of that patty. I can’t believe his grandkids didn’t climb down the beanstalk to eat them. I bet they were delicious.
After Kelsey’s tweet was published, “Sad Grandpa” became an overnight internet celebrity. He’s made Buzzfeed, the Today Show and all the other media outlets around the world that love using sappy, overly sentimental stories to drive page views and web traffic from moms, daughters, sisters and all men who pee setting down. As a result, Papaw’s grandkids are now trying to milk his fame for all it’s worth. For example, check out these “Sad Papaw” t-shirts they’re now selling:
Yeah, that’s an awesome shirt. I bet they sell dozens of them. The grandkids should pool all their resources together and start a screen printing business. Not only did they chose everyone’s favorite font, but they managed to make Papaw look like a cross between Uncle Fester and one of the blue beings from Tool’s Stinkfist music video:
Come on, grandkids! You already stood up Papaw for dinner, at least have the decency to hire a competent graphic designer to make the t-shirts?! Seriously, did they design that in Word or Paint or some online program. I bet they had a big argument on whether to use Comic Sans, Papyrus or Impact.
You can buy the t-shirts at SadPaPaw.com, or better yet, simply show up to the big cookout the family is now throwing this weekend in Purcell:
JUST GOT DONE TALKING TO PAPAW AND HE WANTS TO INVITE EVERYONE OUT FOR A BURGER NEXT SATURDAY?????????? pic.twitter.com/HZppI3Rdws
— Brock Harmon (@BHarmon_10) March 19, 2016
Yep, $2 for gigantic hamburger so tasty that Papaw’s grandkids wouldn’t show up to eat them. That may seem like a health department violation, but I’ve heard all proceeds go to help Papaw find some new grandkids so it’s probably worth it. I think I may gather Sweet Brown, Sir John Michael and The Freeze Softball Team and check it out.