Organ to Or-Gone: OU to close American Organ Institute

There’s been a complete organ shutdown at OU! Surprisingly, we’re not talking about OU Medical Center, but OU the currently controversy assailed institution!

You may have heard the University of Oklahoma has announced it’s closing the American Organ Institute and shutting down the – oxymoron alert – organ technology program. In case you weren’t aware, you’re not on another adventure with Doc Brown. It’s 2019.

I mean, seriously, if I hadn’t read about this with my own eyes I would’ve sworn that someone was screwing with me.

According to Channel 4, there are six students who major in organ technology and 17 who take organ technology courses for their major in pipe organ music. Clearly, this is a massively popular field to be heading into, and I shudder at the prospect of them having to instead study the Casio keyboard.

Then again, this institution has provided some of the most prolific instrumentalists of all time. Before we write off this sacred place of knowledge, let’s acknowledge some of these heroes of the organ world…

The Phantom of the Opera…

That one dwarf from Snow White…

That guy your racist grandfather still listens to – Buddy Cole…

And, lest we forget, J.S. Bach himself…

I believe I’ve proven my point. We will not stand for this injustice! There are literally dozens of us prepared to fight tooth and nail for the reinstatement of this necessary program. I mean after all, as this behemoth of learning is shut down, we all must wonder “What’s next?” I can’t imagine a future without the esteemed OU Street Lamp Lighter program, let alone losing the Telegram Operator Institute.

In these times, all we can do is send up thoughts and prayers through the pipes.

Uncle Lenny is our newest deranged contributor. Wish him luck.