Many Oklahomans were bummed by the announced cancelation of this year’s Great State Fair of Oklahoma, including Sam Stucky. As a native Oklahoman, the self-appointed Corny Carnie of the Inflatable Carnival empire—serving everyone everywhere from here to Guthrie with bounce houses, amusements, concessions, and games— he grew up loving the annual event, in the most unnatural way possible.
“The State Fair and I are in an unhealthy relationship,” Stucky said. “That nostalgia is strong…I always walk away feeling like I spent too much money and ate too much terrible food, but I keep coming back for the abuse. Now that I think about it, can I get counseling for that?”
Driven by this massive loss to the state, instead of whining about it on a random internet forum, Stucky went back to the old days of self-publishing and wrote The Corny Carnie’s Guide to the 2020 Virtual Oklahoma State Fair, a comedic coloring and activity book meant to take the place of the Lost Ogle’s halcyon days of making fun of unsuspecting fairgoers.
“Since you guys made the change to not picking on fairgoers, it left quite a void and a very low bar,” Stucky said. “I thought to myself “Maybe I could get over that bar!” and I think I only missed it by an inch or two…so close. Third place is still a place, though.”
While Stucky was writing the guide, he said that the “dumb thoughts” he usually had while visiting fairs past were the main inspiration behind it, genuinely worried and wondering aloud how would he and many Okies see their yearly allowance of the famed hairstyle known as a mullet this year. He hopes that the book does a passable job of reminding people of the sights, sounds and, more importantly, smells of the event.
“It’s a smell that automatically clogs your arteries and takes years off your life; it’s like catnip to all of us that are under its spell,” Stucky said. “I’m a people watcher and all the colorful people love to peacock out at the fair. I’m also very random and I see lots of things that most people willfully ignore and that makes me laugh, which is why those things appear in my book; if it made me laugh it went into the book.”
Admitting that the Oklahoma State Fair is a “colossal waste of money,” he said that one of the reasons why his book might in fact be better this year is that it’s a “much smaller waste of money.” Currently for sale at his website Inflatablecarnival.net under the merchandise banner, he said it’s a lot harder to have “buyer’s remorse” after spending only $7.00.
“For those of you reading this and think you are buying some kind of well-written novel, I cannot wait to disappoint you,” Stucky jokes. “This is actually a coloring book and an activity book. It is written as immaturely as possible—there are poop and dead goldfish jokes—but nothing that you can’t show your kid who, by the way, thinks poop jokes are way funnier than you do.” .
_
Follow Sam Stucky on Facebook at The Inflatable Carnival.
Follow Louis on Twitter at @LouisFowler and Instagram at @louisfowler78.
In a way this is a win-win. I can get classic literature I can share with my 10 and 7 year old grandsons PLUS avoid life shortening foods! I’ll live forever! So long as the little germ magnets don’t sneak over a that covid killer thingee.
If the booklet lacks the aroma of hot grease frying funnel cakes and Sinckers bars, it will be a poor substitute for actual attendance. Only when you smell that smell do you know that you’re in another time, another place.
Ooo ooo that smell….
The smell of colon death is around you. And pancreas death. And liver death…
How about the Tulsa Fair this year. Go or no-go this yr?
Word is they’re trying to tie it in with another donald covid corral with outdoor TV for all the overflow.
Natural Selection is the word a few Doctors in Texas are starting to toss around. It’s getting that out of control. Almost God like.
Sttttttts ears have perked up.
It’s cancelled, but I suspect only because the “big one” is.
Well, at least it will keep the crime rate down.
But where the hell am I going to get a quadruple deep-fried triple chili corndog wrapped in frybread, dunked in lard, and (yes, one more time) deep fried? With “special sauce”? And a 55-gallon drum ICEE drink? While simultaneously walking among the “people of Walmart”, all of whom are packing heat?
It just won’t be the same.
Meh. Guess I’ll fly to NYC and catch the NY Philharmonic.
If you hurry, you can try Sturgis.
FYI…IMHO….The 1957 Oklahoma Semi-Centennial, staged at the OKC fairgrounds, was the greatest event ever seen on that old prairie field. Popular local TV celebs Danny Williams, Tom Paxton, Lola Hall, Bruce Palmer, Harry Volkman and Squeegee The Clown reported live from the scene. NBC’s nationally televised Today Show, anchored by the one and only Dave “Peace” Garroway, was headquartered there. And, along with hundreds of scintillating rides and fabulous Statehood exhibits, there was tons of good ol’ greasy fair food. Much tastier and astronomically greasier than nowadays. Believe me. I was eight years old and I WAS THERE !
Call me a fuddy-dud spoil sport or whatever but I don’t see where missing a year at the State Fair is that big of a deal.
I see it as just another event that people turn out for because it’s
what you’re ‘supposed to do’ to have fun.
Sort of like driving on the icy roads and freezing your butt off to take
in New Years downtown …. it’s like people end up working pretty damn hard to have fun.
And especially if you have kids that you have to tell them once your’e there “Sorry, we don’t have the money for that.”
Sure, you can walk around and check out the free exhibits and grab a free yardstick and so forth but with all the glitzy enticements, it can be similarly depressing as being hungry while you watch someone eat a nice meal.
Plus as the years go by it appears that they care more about the Horse Crowd than they do the average Okie and they eliminate the popular stuff as cost-cutting measure.
I mean how many people have a horse, anyway? No more Monorail, Car Races, Spacetower, etc.
I used to view the fair as a public event for all people to enjoy, but nowadays I can’t help but think there are ‘Good Ole Boy’ politics
involved among the board of directors… and it’s no longer for the people / by the people.
Everything gets so commercial and I get sick of it.
As Al Eschbach would say to a Thai hooker “Memories … good ones.”
Not to mention taking at least a month off the life of a whole lot of farm show animals.