Back in May of 2015, a couple of weird, narrow, half-finished miniature medians seemingly popped-up overnight in the hipster bar crawl section of N. Western Ave.
Outside of irritating drivers, keeping tire shops in business, and giving credence to the OKC City Council theory that medians are dangerous hellscapes to stand on, we had no clue what they were there for. As a result, we decided to call them the “WTF Medians” and sent Louis to investigate. This is how he described them:
Within one day of appearing, it’s white, freshly dried concrete finish quickly became tarnished with one black rubber burn after another, with a nice collection of hubcaps gathering on both sides of the street. As I was taking the pictures for this piece, a small sporty car skidded right into it, popping of a hubcap with prestidigitatious timing.
Please tell me, road crew, did you mean to do this? Was it a mistake? A joke? An act of vengeance against a community that somehow wronged you?
Naturally, our article pissed off the carpetbaggers who ran the Western Avenue Association. They told us the miniature medians were called Chicanes, and they were being installed as a fancy, decorative way to improve public safety. It made sense. As we all know, nothing is safer than standing on the side of the road, dodging hubcaps, as cars violently swerve to the side to narrowly avoid hitting the random, tiny median stuck in the middle of the street.
Sadly, after a five year run of making unsuspecting motorists say “What the f*ck is that?!”, it looks like the medians are coming to an end.
A popular area along a busy stretch of roadway will soon receive a bit of attention from construction crews.
If you’ve driven along Western Avenue in northwest Oklahoma City, you’ve likely noticed some curb features in the roadway.
The chicanes are designed to slow down traffic, but officials say many drivers are having a hard time navigating them.
Now, city officials say the chicanes will be replaced with crosswalks along much of Western Ave.
That’s sad. The median was annoying, but I was kind of charmed by its character. It was always fun to drive by them and look at all the new rubber scuff marks adorning their sides. Just to piss off Steve Lackmeyer, maybe we can relocate them to the Oklahoma City Boulevard? It could use a few more obstacles now that it has traffic signs.
Anyway, I have no clue when the medians are going to be knocked out and replaced by boring sidewalks. I hope the city gives us a heads-up. I think we’d all like to drive over them one last time before they are gone.