7 quarantine-inspired beers for the Oklahoma homebrewer!

Since COVID-19 doesn’t seem to be going away any time soon, Oklahomans are having to find new ways to entertain themselves from the comfort of their own home. According to News 9, during the pandemic many Okies started diving deep into the hobby of homebrewing and learning to create their own crafts. As a local brewery aficionado and an assistant/taste-tester to a homebrewer, I know Oklahomans generally have a knack for the nectar. So here are 7 quarantine-inspired beers for the Oklahoma homebrewer!

“See You Lager”

The “See You Lager” is a brew that was specially crafted to enjoy during shelter-in-place. Being that the COVID-19 numbers keep rising in the state, it’s a good thing this lager is a session brew. Traditionally, session beers are lower in alcohol so they can be enjoyed for longer periods of time without reaching a state of inebriation and it looks like we’re probably going to be here a while.

“IPA of the Tiger”

With double the citra-hops of your average IPA and an 8.7% ABV, consuming a couple of these Tiger King-inspired beverages gives you a mental state that would be open to rocking a mullet. It tastes almost as bitter as losing a tiger zoo to that goddamn bitch Carol Baskins.

 

“Dim Witbier”

Like an Oklahoman who refuses to take “personal responsibility” by wearing a mask, this Witbier was left without an airlock in the fermentation process and ruined.

 

“Roll Bock Restrictions”

A Maibock is traditionally brewed for late spring/early summer enjoyment. This Maibock was brewed to celebrate the first wave of re-openings in April. This brew doesn’t age well.

 

“Governor Kevin Stout”

With its notoriously high alcohol percentage, the “Governor Kevin Stout” is the perfect beverage to have for a Stitt press conference drinking game. Just take a drink of this stout every time he drops the term, “personal responsibility,” and in maybe 15 minutes you’ll be drunk enough to think Stitt’s policies actually make sense.

 

“Oklahoma Bitter”

Bitters are popular brews around the holidays. It’s also common nowadays for extended relatives in Oklahoma to be bitter about you not showing up for the holiday celebrations. Thankfully bitters age well, so this brew should still be good for next Christmas.

 

“Saison It Ain’t So”

The taste of coriander in this beer is much like COVID-19 numbers rising in a state with few pandemic restrictions: it’s intense and initially shocking, but ultimately to be expected.

Hayley likes to review beers. Find out about her podcast and follow her on twitter @squirrellygeek. Then become a contributing member of TLO here.

 

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5 Responses


  1. Anyone who reads this tripe hip to Brother Thelonious Belgian style abbey ale?


  2. You left out Ganja Guiness a dark heavy brew that requires a prescription from a doctor to buy. But you can get it on any corner where there was formerly an abandoned building but is now a licensed purveyor of the good stuff.


  3. When it comes to beer, wine, vape juice and
    a lot of food, seems as though the more exotic
    and appetizing the name implies, the less I like it
    after giving it a try.

    Guess I’ll never have any class.


    1. Or maybe you already do.


  4. Suthern Baptiss Pew Brew. Good with crackers.

    So sorry.

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